Posted by daisym on April 19, 2006, at 16:32:43
In reply to Pls read: hubby goes to female T/T is your hubby, posted by orchid on April 19, 2006, at 13:11:37
I think this is an inflammatory thread, with potential to make a lot of people feel bad and I know better than respond.
But..
This issue was brought up before by someone who said she was the significant other of a therapist. I took her posts into therapy with me, because essentially she said we should all be ashamed of ourselves and get a life. My therapist said she had no right to speak for others and that most therapists, and their spouses, know this is part of the package. They talk about it and they have ways to deal with their feelings. He emphasized that it is the therapist's job to take care of him or herself and the client does not need to apologize for legitimate feelings that grow. Depending on the type of therapy, these feelings are expected and show growth, trust and commitment to the therapeutic process.
All that said, we already know some therapists don't do well with these feelings, so it makes sense that their spouses wouldn't either. I would like to point out that certainly there are multitudes of careers that this kind of thing can happen -- look at teachers, just to choose one. Who didn't develop a crush on at least one college professor?
I might struggle with my attachment. And I might feel bad and guilty and a bunch of other things. But no one gets to approve or disapprove of my feelings anymore. Except me.
poster:daisym
thread:634800
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060406/msgs/634848.html