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Re: All/Ms. Lott: Restorative Justice/Love with T

Posted by allisonross on October 20, 2005, at 10:52:39

In reply to Re: Loving your Therapist deborah anne lott, posted by pinkeye on August 2, 2005, at 17:49:59

Hi, Ms. Lott: i intend to read your book! Would you read my story? The Transcendent Child on Overcoming Verbal and Spiritual Abuse by Alice Carleton (published with the Ph.D.'s, no less!)

Also my website: poems of anguish, healing, hope and comfort.....after being voted out of a 31-year church membership (what I know now, is legalism), because I got a divorce fter 31 years of abuse (consider myself an "expert' in verbal abuse---it is rampant on our planet, and rarely noticed) name was put up on a big screen in front of the church, followed by the words: CONDUCT UNBECOMING A CHILD OF GOD. i fought the spiritually abusive system for 18 months, to try and stop the pastor (of disaster) from 'counseling" any more women, because 2 of them wanted to commit suicide, because of his "counseling" skills.......I was called to a meeting of deacons (17 "men"), not allowed to have a woman present, and asked if i was 'still having sex with my ex." no boundaries! My therapist showed up to journey with me thru the debacle. he taught me the most valuable words I ever heard: RESTORATIVE JUSTICE--This is what you did---this is how it made me empowering to someone abused for a lifetime (except for 3 years in the army) therapist told me that it sounded as if "God was dictating the words of the poems to me." it has been a phenomenon; strangers from all ove the world; with the most healing, exquisite words to say to me about my website. I waited 2 years and wrote to everyone in that church --10 page letter! (restorative justice), and then requested the amount of $ I had to spend in therapy from the 'pastor"---a year later, the church's insurance company sent a "token" amount ...I fell in love with my t after over a year; I told him that if I had met him somewhere else, i would have been attracted to him, etc......only been attracted to a few men in my life; it happens rarely.....I told my t that he is male form! He explained transference as......not some hidden, voo-doo thing that some people think it is (of course, there is the Fruedian transference), but as my T explained, we ALL experience transference; simply feelings we engender in each other, is very painful to be in unrequited love (although there are many boundary "bendings' I am aware!!.....he decided after long discussions, that we could 'still do good work together" Thanks so much for reading this; I would tell you the whole story, but only in a private e-mail! Hugs, Alice (overcomer and wounded-healer). .P.S. I counsel abused women, because of my lifetime of experience and extensive research.......




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