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Re: Is friendship supposed to be better? » Dinah

Posted by JenStar on May 4, 2005, at 20:21:40

In reply to Is friendship supposed to be better?, posted by Dinah on May 4, 2005, at 18:36:06

I'm sure you're special to everyone in your life, Dinah, not just your T . :)

I think friendship isn't necessarily better, as long as you have good boundaries, which you def. seem to have with your T. I've never heard you express sexual/romantic feelings for him, and you seem very clear about expectations on both ends. So for you it seems that the relationship is very healthy and solid, and you like it the way it is.

It seems that some people have a much harder time setting up those kind of groundrules in their mind. I know a lot of people really seem to desire a closer relationship with the T, maybe the kind where they get to offer advice/support in kind, get and are are given affection, and share the kind of emotional bond that seems to come with friendship. Maybe it's because it's hard to "get" that someone who sees the "real us" isn't magnetically drawn to us; doesn't go crazy trying to find a way to be with us all the time. After all, if we're so great (which we're learning to feel about ourselves), why isn't the T breaking down doors to be our friend? Anyway, that's the way it would go in MY mind, I think!

I admire the kind of relationship you have with your T. I think it's really a good role-model of what the healthy client/T relationship looks like!

take care,
jenStar


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poster:JenStar thread:493094
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050504/msgs/493860.html