Posted by Klokka on August 15, 2004, at 21:17:18
In reply to Boundaries (may trigger), posted by lucy stone on August 14, 2004, at 15:56:52
My pdoc seems to be about the same, for the most part.
> He would never encourage me to add an extra session, even if I were in great distress.I'm not sure if this a matter of can't or won't, but that would never happen with mine, either.
> He would never call to check on me, even if I had had a very difficult session or was in obvious distress. We had an argument about this once, and he implied that he would not call and check on me even if I were in one of my suicidal periods. I have promised that I would call him before I hurt myself and he said that he trusts that I would do that. I'm not sure I believe him on that one (that he wouldn't call), so I personally think he would.
I don't know whether he would do that, but I really doubt it.
> He would never volunteers any personal information about himself.
For the most part mine doesn't either, but will make the occasional comment. He did end up saying quite a bit about being raised Catholic one session when we were talking about theology, though. (It came up because of a question he asked about my faith which required more than a little explanation.)
> He very, very seldom initiates the conversation in a session, he waits for me to start.
My pdoc is a bit different in this respect, because I don't tend to bring things up very easily. Usually "How are you?" or some questions about any recent/upcoming significant events are enough to start me talking, but if that doesn't work he will usually bring something up. I did make it clear from the outset that I had a lot of trouble with finding things to say and might not come up with anything even if it meant sitting in silence for the entire time, though.
> He seldom carries thoughts or topics from one session to the next, he waits for me to do that. Once in a while he will start a session with thoughts from a previous one, but they are rare.
My pdoc tends to link a session's topic with recent ones if there is a connection. Probably a good thing, because I couldn't see things like that if my life depended on it.
> There is more, but these are the things that stick out for me right now. On the flip side of the above, he will try very hard to add a session if I tell him I want one, even if he has to stay past his usual leaving hour to do so. He always returns calls promptly, usually within an hour or two. He will answer any question I have about him as honestly and truthfully as he can. So he's great, but has a different definition of boundaries than many other Ts.
Mine doesn't seem like he would be willing to add sessions, but that very well may be because he seems to have a very packed schedule and I don't pay for sessions (healthcare system covers it.) He will sometimes answer phone calls promptly, but it depends on timing. I've learned that I will usually have to wait until the afternoon to hear from him. I haven't asked him anything about himself, so I don't know how he would answer. On the other hand, even though his schedule is difficult to work with, he does seem quite willing to make things work out as much as possible, tends to stay late if necessary when something unforeseen results in an appointment being unworkable, and often schedules tentative appointments when on call (obviously these get cancelled if he's needed at the time, but it's better than nothing.) I think that's the only thing which has kept me from going completely crazy with worry over scheduling my college courses - thirty hours per week leaves little room for appointments.
poster:Klokka
thread:377663
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040812/msgs/378062.html