Posted by Dinah on August 6, 2004, at 10:59:44
In reply to Re: amazingly strong! JenStar, posted by JenStar on August 6, 2004, at 0:01:20
JenStar, I just wanted to thank you for this post. It helps me quite a bit to hear where you're coming from in this topic, and that you're interested in hearing different experiences.
I wish I had the brainpower to answer you right now, or the time, but I'll give it some consideration.
I suppose my general answer, though, is that we're all different and we all need different things. What's appropriate for one client may be inappropriate and even totally incomprehensible for another.
As for knowing when it's valuable to be dependent on a therapist and when it's harmful, I wish there was a clear set of guidelines to determine that. Because when you're in the middle of *any* situation, it's hard to be objective about it yourself. I'd say that it's wise to obtain a consultation if you have any doubts. Perhaps there should even be professional guidelines for periodic, maybe once a year, consultations. And you have to trust your gut to some extent. And the objective evidence as to whether you're doing better or worse. I get feedback from friends and family from time to time. My husband is violently opposed to my leaving therapy, if that is a somewhat objective opinion.
And I suppose that most of the most valuable experiences in life involve risk. Those things that have the greatest potential to help us also have the greatest potential to hurt us. (Just think of marriage - lol.)
And for me, becoming dependent on the therapist and then going through a natural and healthy growth away from him (as I think I'm beginning to do now, but I'm fighting it) has helped me quite a bit in feeling like I can rely on myself. Because I'm being allowed to move into that at my own pace, as opposed to being prematurely being thrown into it as I was in my family of origin.
poster:Dinah
thread:372818
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040805/msgs/374681.html