Posted by kazoo on November 21, 2003, at 1:17:31
In reply to Death is so final, posted by Jai on November 17, 2003, at 22:01:25
I am told that there's nothing worse for a parent to outlive their children; however, it doesn't matter which way this formula goes. By this I mean to say grief and loss of any family member at any age at any time is an ineffable pain no matter how you look at it.
I lost my older brother Joseph in 1994 (HCV), my Father in 1996 (brain cancer) and more recently my Mother December 6, 2001 (pulmonary shut-down). I wrote three obits, planned three wakes and funerals and wrote and delivered three eulogies ... you'd think I'd become inured to this kind of thing, but I'm not. One never does. It hurts me constantly to know that those I once knew and loved are physically gone, and spiritually somewhere else.
I went back to my faith (Roman Catholic) after the death of my Mother and found comfort there, but when I'm alone it all comes back to me like cruel spectres of the Past, reliving the events to their ultimate finality. What these events did do for me personally was to appreciate every breath I take and to understand my own mortality. Life is beautiful and death to me an aesthetic extension to this reality.
With heartfelt sympathies to you and your family, I remain ...
(Just a) Kazoo
poster:kazoo
thread:280706
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/281959.html