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Re: Hoping Nardil kicks in at 60 (wk3) - up to 90

Posted by PeterMartin on May 16, 2018, at 0:42:22

In reply to Re: Hoping Nardil kicks in at 60 (wk3) - up to 90 PeterMartin, posted by SLS on May 11, 2018, at 7:10:29

Sorry to not answer the questions but I just wanted to post that I'm having a really rough time. Man this has been a real rollercoaster and I'm in the pit of it right now.

I started 90mg on the 6th so this is day 9 and a day where I felt like I was fighting myself. I stayed in bed most of the day. Had no interest in using the computer or doing other things I usually do. At the same time I felt this hunch like I'm on the cusp of relief. As if the chemicals are all there but I'm just not getting that flick over to feeling better....instead I'm in this terrible hole.

I had a lot of Orthostatic hypotension so I take that as a good sign. But it's just so odd that after periods of success at 60mg and 75mg that I'd be completely starting over almost at 90......waiting for it to kick in again. I just keep believing it will and if the trend of complaining about it to relief continues it may be very soon. At the same time it's very much night and day...and when I'm in the night (like now) I can't remember what it's like in the day.

I had some bad thoughts of maybe taking a small amount of marplan to try to kick me over the edge but I resisted that. I just need to wait it out and I guess I'll do it in bed - at least I'm content there and not dreading it. If anything I'm grumpy/irritable about my lack of motivation/adhedonia.

I'm still taking 2000 metformin and my wt is 221ish (it was 216ish at start on Jan 25). I can't complain about that.....I'm recently up on that from 1500 so it could be another factor in my depression. I'm not sure. I'm just frustrated. I won't be full frustrated for another few weeks at 90mg but it baffles me that at this dose I feel probably the worst I've felt (just today really)......

Hopefully I'm just really treatment _resistant_ and my "ego" or whatever will lose the battle to feel better even if it's artificially induced....




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