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Re: Rejection sensitivity and I want to die again » uncouth

Posted by sac on December 27, 2009, at 9:05:13

In reply to Re: Rejection sensitivity and I want to die again, posted by uncouth on December 22, 2009, at 21:53:08

Just want to let you know that you are not alone in this. All the people on this board are here because they suffer from mental illness. It does not make us weak or abnormal. In fact, we are stronger than most BECAUSE of it. I have spent the last twenty years trying different medications, been on basically everything you are on now, Some helped, some didn't. Currently on Prozac, Lithium, wellbutrin, and serax as needed. Despite my history of major depression with some hypomanic episodes in between, I am what others would consider very successful. What they don't see is the daily struggle. Each day, I don't know how I will feel. If it's a "good" day, I can accommplish alot. If it's not a good day, I will want to sleep as much as possible. There is not a day that goes by that I am not acutely aware of my mood and how it will affect my day. I, too, look at others sometimes with envy that they just seem to be genuinely happy and I want that too. Just keep pushing on. Your illness is not who you ARE. We don't blame people for having diabetes, or heart disease, or physical disabilities. In the same way, do not blame yourself for having a condition that is a real medical condition. It took me a long time to realize this and I still get down on myself sometimes too, it's only natural. Just know that everyone on this board supports you and really knows what you are going through. I hope that you will find the right mix of meds, and for goodness sake, if you need a cigarette, have one, don't beat yourself up over it. You can quit when you feel better. Take one day at a time. Best of luck to you.


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