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Re: Anyone? » Kristi

Posted by shelliR on May 19, 2001, at 20:37:26

In reply to Anyone?, posted by Kristi on May 18, 2001, at 16:48:18

Kristi, I wanted to write two things to you in response to what you are telling us .

First, about chronic fatigue syndrome: it is not just tiredness and lack of motivation. It almost always includes swollen glands and a sore throat, and other symptoms of infection. So I doubt that is what you have, unless you have those symptoms.

Second, about dealing with repressed memories. You may decide now that you don't want to go searching after past memories, but my experience personally, and in knowing a lot of sexual and physical abuse survivors, is that eventually the memories come after you. Sometimes it seems out of nowhere and sometimes it is precipitated by something specific, e.g., having a daughter the same age as you were when you were abused.

I would say for sure that you need to talk to someone about what you are feeling right now. A psychologist might be a good choice because they would not be pushing meds directly on you (although they might want you to go to a psychiatrist for a consultation.)

I would not try to force memories to come up. They became repressed to protect you, and now even though you don't need that protection in the same way, you don't want to flood yourself with more than you can handle. Memories sort of have a life of their own. But when they come up, I would not push them back down either. I would anticipate for you that memories may come up eventually, and I would hope that you were working with someone who specializes that that field. Many specialists in trauma are now working with EMDR (you can find it on the web) rather than hypnosis, to process memories.

You might want to read some articles or books by Judith Herman-MD from Harvard. She has a rather simple and elegant way of describing what happens when repressed memories emerge, and what type of treatment is needed. She deals not only with victims of childhood abuse, but also political prisoners and war veterans. I believe she thinks it is important for everyone with a trauma background to both know their story and share their story (with a group or therapist, not with everyone you meet.) If you do a search, you'll come up with some stuff of hers on the web.

Good luck to you, Shelli


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