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Re: Feeling hopeless

Posted by JohnL on February 25, 2000, at 14:30:45

In reply to Feeling hopeless, posted by Ellen on February 25, 2000, at 7:28:19

> For the first time during my manic depression I can truly say I feel hopeless. My depression has been so bad and I am a rapid cycler that I feel as though I can barely keep my head above water. I have a great psychiatrist now but with all this med changing I am wondering if this shit ever ends. I am turning everyone away, especially my husband. He has been nothing but loving and supportive but I just push him away. I don't even want to go to my therapist any more. I feel like I have nothing to say to anyone. As crazy as this sounds my life line are my dogs. Usually when I have been on this site it has been in reponse to drugs and stuff, now I just needed to poor my guts out. I know that we are all in the same boat and I am not the only one that feels this awful. I could babble forever but I would just be boring everyone. I only hope that for all of us here that we can find the strength and courage to get through this. I don't want to spend the rest of my life like this. Ellen

I'm so sorry for the way you are feeling Ellen. But believe me, you aren't alone. We've all been there, or are there, or will again be there at some point in time. You are in good company.

Is the psychiatrist aware of how bad you feel? Is he or she concentrating on too narrow an approach? By that I mean too few classes of different drugs? Sometimes they get so bogged down in antidepressants and augmentations and combinations that they fail to see that a quick response is right under their nose, in the form of a stimulant or an antipsychotic or an electrical smoother (mood stabilizer). A bang bang bang trial of 2, 3, or 4 drugs for a week or two in each class of drugs is the surest way to weed out inferior matches for you, and to discover superior matches. Once superior matches are encountered, we can then narrow the search by concentrating on that class of drugs, dosing, time, etc. There's no easy answer, but I believe fast exploration of uncharted waters is highly likely to provide surprising results when current approaches are disappointing.

Hang in there. We're cheering for you. JohnL


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