![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 23 to 47 of 47. Go back in thread:
Posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:53:41
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » alexandra_k, posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:38:20
Do you need calculus? if you need physics, then you need calculus, but do you need physics for a pre-med program? I guess physicians do stuff with radiology that are physics-based. I never thought about medicine and physics.
Chemistry is really a breeze. Seems intimidating, and there is a lot of memorization, but there's a logic to chemistry -- not an easy logic, but a logic -- whereas biology and physiology have no logic at all. Just rote memorization
Posted by alexandra_k on December 22, 2013, at 20:36:47
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » baseball55, posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:53:41
> Do you need calculus? if you need physics, then you need calculus, but do you need physics for a pre-med program? I guess physicians do stuff with radiology that are physics-based. I never thought about medicine and physics.
just the one: 'physics for life sciences'. mechanics, thermal physics, wave motion, electricity and instrumentation. it is meant to be about last year high school level - but instrumentation stuff is new for everyone.
this is meant to be one of the 4 easier papers to help lighten the load. but since my background is in things like english literature, education, philosophy, social psychology, and cognitive neuroscience... uh... the 'easier' papers are mostly novel content for me.
> Chemistry is really a breeze. Seems intimidating, and there is a lot of memorization, but there's a logic to chemistry -- not an easy logic, but a logic
it seems nice and lego-landish. tractatus-like. or something... i've just started learning the functional groups but i don't know any synthesis reactions as yet. i'm a bit worried about balancing equations. sometimes they give us products and we are supposed to say how much of whatever we get out of it. i think we do stuff about rates of synthesis, too.
i think mostly what the summer school calculus will do is give me a better idea of how much trouble i am likely to have with numbers... and i can see about getting extra help supports in place before the start of the year if i need extra help. it might just be that i benefit from the extra practice. i know i get better at working with numbers when i am working with numbers... even silly things like grading... data entry... i'm not particularly number literate... and so... i wasn't really given the opportunity to develop higher level conceptual apparatus... i might be a bit of a slow learner...
> -- whereas biology and physiology have no logic at all.
physiology has logic! i did anatomy / physiology at tech (exercise science) and really freaking loved it! it is fairly synthetic... what i liked most about the anatomy / physiology exam was that there wasn't any labelling of bony landmarks or whatever... but there were puzzle type questions that you needed to figure out... like house ahahaha. what i like about physiology is understanding the components of the system and how they work together... then when you get a certain output trying to figure the different ways in which things can break down... figure how probing different things will help tease things apart / pinpoint the problem. like electrical circuits or something i guess ahaha. like... trying to come up with a theory of mind on the basis of behavior and stroke etc...
it is messier than legoland, though, i take your point about that. i suspect it has something to do with non-linearity (and feedback loops) but i don't even really know what that means ahahaha.
it is funny how different people seem to take to the different papers. i mean... some people say they really loved the epidemiology paper (seems a lot like a more precise version of critical thinking to me, i think i will enjoy it a lot) whereas other people say they really loved the chemistry (or that they found it easy / enjoyable)...
i don't know what i'll take to... i had trouble with basic arithmetic... so i sort of gave up on math real early. then that prevented me learning the hard sciences... then discovering all anybody seems to want is mathematical modellers. sigh.
bio-medical engineering.
sigh.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 22, 2013, at 22:39:26
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 22, 2013, at 20:36:47
ah... i see now...
this is the thing to do. it will be how i'll get to meet the highly motivated returning older people who don't have a background in math / physics / chemistry. the social people / those with experience in the field... aka: the ones who might help haul my *ss through the interview if i can help them haul their *ss*s through the academic part... quid pro quo clarisse...there is a calculus paper... a physics paper (which is full but i bet if i show up they won't turn me away)... then the chemistry runs a week long course later, once the summer school is finished.
i'll need to ask if i can suspend my enrollment for my thesis or something... until next summer... if i want this to work (and i want this to work really a whole f*ck*ng heap) then i'm going to need to put in some preparatory work...
also... i'm so tired of being left to flouder by myself. so tired...
get supervisor work for the 3rd... then tell him my cunning plan...
i think (fingers crossed) that the enrollment people don't mind...
?
good for them too?
yes?
Posted by Dr. Bob on December 22, 2013, at 23:21:09
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 22, 2013, at 1:45:50
> i don't understand this idea of broadcasting the same thing to everyone.
I have to say, that gave me a chuckle. Then I saw:
> i am differently social with different people.
and then I got what you were saying. Just use the Internet differently than other people?
Bob
Posted by sigismund on December 23, 2013, at 1:31:54
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » baseball55, posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:53:41
>Chemistry is really a breeze. Seems intimidating, and there is a lot of memorization, but there's a logic to chemistry -- not an easy logic, but a logic -- whereas biology and physiology have no logic at all. Just rote memorization
I would have liked biology; lots and lots of classification. Never liked experimental sciences.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 2:28:34
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by sigismund on December 23, 2013, at 1:31:54
> I would have liked biology; lots and lots of classification. Never liked experimental sciences.you would have liked psychiatry, then :)
Posted by sleepygirl2 on December 23, 2013, at 9:56:55
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by sigismund on December 23, 2013, at 1:31:54
I took a lot of chem, and I've got to say, I'm still not sure what all that was about. It's another language that I only learned the most basic phrases in. Biology, however, I love that stuff.
I loved microbiology and parasitology. It was a short hobby of mine. I liked anatomy and physiology, most of it. I liked looking at the brain.
Off on a tangent I go...
Posted by Phillipa on December 23, 2013, at 10:01:49
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » sigismund, posted by sleepygirl2 on December 23, 2013, at 9:56:55
I loved Nursing all of it. How I wish could do again. So much to learn and so many to help. Phillipa
Posted by baseball55 on December 23, 2013, at 21:42:19
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 22, 2013, at 20:36:47
If you're going to take calculus, have you taken pre-calculus (what used to be called analytical geometry)? Calculus is impossible without pre-calc.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:22:36
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by baseball55 on December 23, 2013, at 21:42:19
> If you're going to take calculus, have you taken pre-calculus (what used to be called analytical geometry)? Calculus is impossible without pre-calc.
it is meant to be calculus for people who have no calculus.
i hear everything is impossible if you... never learned your three times tables. whatever... i guess one just has to pick a place to start and then run with it.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:23:18
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:22:36
oh. i hear our math is different from your math. which is what makes the GRE particularly hard for us. even the mathematically inclined among us.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:24:34
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:22:36
> it is meant to be calculus for people who have no calculus.actually... better than that. it is calculus for people who have no calculus who want to go on to study physics / math for engineering / science. so i guess they will tell us what we need to know for those courses hopefully in a way that we can understand. it they are any good, that is.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 25, 2013, at 16:26:03
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by Dr. Bob on December 22, 2013, at 23:21:09
> > i don't understand this idea of broadcasting the same thing to everyone.
> I have to say, that gave me a chuckle. Then I saw:
> > i am differently social with different people.
> and then I got what you were saying. Just use the Internet differently than other people?i don't understand how you got a chuckle out of it. is it because the main reason why most people seem to like facebook is precisely because they get to broadcast the same thing to everyone - in the sense they can just post it once instead of needing to notify everyone individually?
i guess i will just use it differently. i mean, there is little else to be done.
i am just sad that the masses discovered it at all. that now i need to figure out better search strategies to avoid all the crappy copy-pasted articles 'written' by 10 year olds that google seems to be increasingly throwing up on the first few pages of my search...
maybe i need a better search engine / better search strategy. i want broader than library database but narrower than standard google... google scholar is even a mixed bag these days... sigh.
is that sort of the idea of twitter / blogs... word of mouth... however many degrees of separation... social networking...
never mind reading something and assessing it on its merits. there is too much sh*t out there... need some way to do an initial cull at the very least. so... who said it / who are they endorsed by.
i see.
that was what was good about the internet. i thought. it wasn't like that.
Posted by Dr. Bob on December 27, 2013, at 2:32:52
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » Dr. Bob, posted by alexandra_k on December 25, 2013, at 16:26:03
> > > i don't understand this idea of broadcasting the same thing to everyone.
>
> > I have to say, that gave me a chuckle. Then I saw:
>
> > > i am differently social with different people.
>
> > and then I got what you were saying.
>
> i don't understand how you got a chuckle out of it.Because you broadcast a lot here. :-)
Bob
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 19:28:51
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by Dr. Bob on December 27, 2013, at 2:32:52
> Because you broadcast a lot here. :-)
ah. the illusion of anonymity. i don't know who these twitter people are... but they better not be my work colleagues or supervisors or people i know from high school or... whatever.
if they are... then i don't think i want to know. i don't know that i could cope with that.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 19:35:02
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore » Dr. Bob, posted by alexandra_k on December 25, 2013, at 16:26:03
i used to have a journal. at high school. things weren't really going so well for me. at school. at life. one of the tasks we had to do for english (my best class, i guess, insofar as i liked reading books) was to do a journal. i'm not entirely sure what we were supposed to be doing... vague memories of the grading criterion... a couple entries per week... some stuff with different styles...
i hadn't done it. then... well... i'd had a fight with my mother or something... in my room... feeling angry and hurt and alone... and i started writing. developed the half-*ss*d poetry style i do in an attempt to get some extra style marks for poetry. or something. just a whole bunch of stuff... and i got an A. i don't think i got an A for anything else at high school.
and things continued like that. i didn't really do any work... i mostly got in trouble for drinking and drugs and not attending... but i kept handing those journals in... and... i guess it was what saved me from being properly expelled. on multiple occasions.
ended up in an inappropriate relationship with one of my teachers... one who... read my journal over a period of a few years. to grade it. you know... anyway... that is probably why i feel it best not to meet anyone who reads my journal. if that makes sense. actually it doesn't make sense... i just... i don't know. i don't know what i'm staying.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 21:08:48
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 19:35:02
i never had anyone to talk to.
one of my therapists said to me. when i was like 'but nothing much happened to me, really'. she was like 'but you never had anyone to talk to'. and... she was right - i didn't.
but i was highly verbal. had a lot going on in that respect. round and round and round and f*ck*ng round inside of me... because... i didn't have anyone to talk to.
the journal was the first opportunity i had to write stuff down and... give to to someone. get it away from me. and then... get something back. some kind of... acknowledgement. the odd comment here and there. i felt... less alone. and sometimes the odd comment would speak to me and help. but it helped to just feel less alone.
babble is my journal now. i don't know what to say. i... it is all the stuff i can't talk about. not to anyone. i... don't know what to say.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:18:50
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 21:08:48
i lost my journal when i got together with her. and then i didn't have anyone to talk to, again. just about our relationship, i guess... but that kind of took over. and i didn't have anyone to talk to about the things that were concerning me the most.
and then i got all depressed and stuff. and i got a therapist. eventually. and she would journal stuff i said to her in my file notes. and nurses and doctors and so on and so forth would read her interpretation and interpret that themselves and try and give me a right talking to about this and that that they thought was what was wrong with me and what i needed to do etc etc etc.
and so i couldn't talk to her anymore. was fairly mute in sessions, really. i wanted to... but i couldn't.
and then however many years later i find babble. and i talk here. and i met a babbler... and that was mostly okay. because she wasn't terribly active here (in a personal way) and she was so very cautious about her own privacy. and then i met damos. and that was okay. and we became friends and hung out quite a bit... and i was scared that that might change things for me. that this wouldn't be a place for me anymore... but it didn't. i think some combination of our being friends and nothing more... and his not posting here as much as he did before.
and when i got blocked it was like... like i'd been suspended from school or something. and i didn't have anyone... anywhere to talk, again. and i didn't understand why you blocked me. i couldn't make sense of it. so i couldn't get any sort of power over it in terms of thinking that if only i did this or that or whatever then it wouldn't happen again. so i felt powerless in the hands of capricious gods. and i feel apart, rather.
i guess i mostly forgot is how i found my way back. and because i thought i'd be stuck into writing up about now... and i was posting at babble around the time i got my masters done so maybe i could tap into some of that... i don't know.
computers scare me now. because they don't seem anonymous the way they used to be. i'd have a password on my computer and a password on my email and a password on a couple other places... and things felt kind of safe and protected.
but now there are to many different passwords and logins with different constraints... more than my memory can handle so i gotta write that sh*t down. and then it doesn't feel safe anymore. and my computer tries to save everything to autocomplete stuff - so then i don't get what is the point of the password anymore. and places want your real information to log in. none of this anonymous stuff. they want your real name and real address and a working phone number. they want to know what primary school you went to and what your first pets name was. your best friend in high school and your mothers maiden name. i have a serious aversion to providing this kind of information...
and so things don't feel anonymous anymore. the computer does stuff and i don't know what it is doing. automatically logs me in to the mac game store or whatever when my system boots up. has my credit card details saved to file for ease of purchase. has it always auto running in the background. google searches my emails to try and provide more inspirational advertisements. skype wants an open internet channel... always...
sh*t sh*t sh*t it is full of sh*t. and... invasive.. and... like there is no place in this world where i can be me. where i can relax and let my guard down and not have... people use me for their own ends. whether it be some sense of righteousness they get for giving me a talking to or whatever... people more seriously trying to take advantage.. getting to know people better... well... i guess that is when they start trying to change me. trying to make me be like them. when they... really become invasive / insensitive to me. people will have you on.... and when you opt out of the jostling / vaguely concealed insults etc rubbish then they will steamroll you. just because they can. i write people off then. because i don't want to be friends with people like that. but apparently that is just how people are. even the good ones among them. this strategy of mine just... leaves me with nothing. i don't know how to keep people at arms length. there isn't any place in this world that is safe for me.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:25:40
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:18:50
and gmail wants to keep you auto logged in. and wants to synch up a bunch of stuff AND I DON"T WANT THINGS TO BE SYNCHED I WANT THINGS TO BE FRAGMENTED AND IT WILL NOT LET ME. it wants to link up different gmail accounts. it wants to put my real picture on my gmail accounts. it wants it to be easy to video chat to people.
i can't even get my mac id straight without contacting the customer support people and telling them that various accounts they have (for different things) are different addresses for the same person. why should i have to tell them this? it is none of their f*ck*ng business. i shuold be able to check my cloud settings (make sure it isn't keychaining things i don't want it to) without telling them what town my mother grew up in ffs.
i... i don't like this at all.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:33:33
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:25:40
yesterday my mac informed me it was sending apple an error report. it isn't ask me if i wanted to send mac an error report. it told me that that was what it was going to do.
i don't like this.
Posted by Dr. Bob on December 31, 2013, at 15:29:53
In reply to Re: i don't like the internet anymore, posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2013, at 16:18:50
> i used to have a journal. at high school. things weren't really going so well for me. at school. at life. one of the tasks we had to do for english ... was to do a journal.
>
> i hadn't done it. then... well... i'd had a fight with my mother or something... in my room... feeling angry and hurt and alone... and i started writing. ... just a whole bunch of stuff... and i got an A. i don't think i got an A for anything else at high school.
>
> and things continued like that. i didn't really do any work... i mostly got in trouble ... but i kept handing those journals in... and... i guess it was what saved me from being properly expelled. on multiple occasions.
>
> ended up in an inappropriate relationship with one of my teachers... one who... read my journal over a period of a few years. to grade it. you know... anyway... that is probably why i feel it best not to meet anyone who reads my journal. if that makes sense. actually it doesn't make sense... i just... i don't know. i don't know what i'm staying.> i never had anyone to talk to.
>
> the journal was the first opportunity i had to write stuff down and... give to to someone. get it away from me. and then... get something back. some kind of... acknowledgement. the odd comment here and there. i felt... less alone. and sometimes the odd comment would speak to me and help. but it helped to just feel less alone.
>
> babble is my journal now. i don't know what to say. i... it is all the stuff i can't talk about. not to anyone. i... don't know what to say.> and then i got all depressed and stuff. and i got a therapist. eventually. and she would journal stuff i said to her in my file notes. and nurses and doctors and so on and so forth would read her interpretation and interpret that themselves and try and give me a right talking to about this and that that they thought was what was wrong with me and what i needed to do etc etc etc.
>
> and so i couldn't talk to her anymore. was fairly mute in sessions, really. i wanted to... but i couldn't.
>
> and then however many years later i find babble. and i talk here. and i met a babbler... and that was mostly okay. because she wasn't terribly active here (in a personal way) and she was so very cautious about her own privacy. and then i met damos. and that was okay. and we became friends and hung out quite a bit... and i was scared that that might change things for me. that this wouldn't be a place for me anymore... but it didn't. i think some combination of our being friends and nothing more... and his not posting here as much as he did before.
>
> and when i got blocked it was like... like i'd been suspended from school or something. and i didn't have anyone... anywhere to talk, again. and i didn't understand why you blocked me. i couldn't make sense of it. so i couldn't get any sort of power over it in terms of thinking that if only i did this or that or whatever then it wouldn't happen again. so i felt powerless in the hands of capricious gods. and i feel apart, rather.
>
> i guess i mostly forgot is how i found my way back. and because i thought i'd be stuck into writing up about now... and i was posting at babble around the time i got my masters done so maybe i could tap into some of that... i don't know.
>
> computers scare me now. because they don't seem anonymous the way they used to be. i'd have a password on my computer and a password on my email and a password on a couple other places... and things felt kind of safe and protected.
>
> sh*t sh*t sh*t it is full of sh*t. and... invasive.. and... like there is no place in this world where i can be me. where i can relax and let my guard down and not have... people use me for their own ends. whether it be some sense of righteousness they get for giving me a talking to or whatever... people more seriously trying to take advantage.. getting to know people better... well... i guess that is when they start trying to change me. trying to make me be like them. when they... really become invasive / insensitive to me. people will have you on.... and when you opt out of the jostling / vaguely concealed insults etc rubbish then they will steamroll you. just because they can.People do interpret things themselves. My interpretation is that blocking you felt like giving you a talking to, trying to change you, becoming invasive / insensitive, and finally steamrolling you.
Maybe since then you've changed. And maybe Babble has, too. I'm glad you have your journal back.
Bob
Posted by HomelyCygnet on January 1, 2014, at 15:53:01
In reply to Re: babble is my journal now, posted by Dr. Bob on December 31, 2013, at 15:29:53
But she doesn't have it not really. You have it. She has no control over it after it is posted. Some think you have drifted into an inappropriate therapeutic relationship with her so there are lots of parallels aren't there? I often get the creepy feeling that this is all written to you. This sort of unpunctuated stream of conscious adolescent oversharing. She claims you are one of the only people people who has ever understood her. And that she has some special understanding of you. How reality based is that? She spent years posting hysterical messages to you after she was blocked. Completely stereotypical BPD. And you encourage it. I don't think that is healthy. I remember how she used to freak out over having all that crap posted for eternity and harming her "career" prospects. Isn't that still a concern for you? I think you are taking advantage of a fragile vulnerable person and it's very concerning. I think if you want to do therapy with her and she is willing you should donate your services and establish a professional relationship with some safeguards for her.
>
> Maybe since then you've changed. And maybe Babble has, too. I'm glad you have your journal back.
>
> Bob
Posted by alexandra_k on January 1, 2014, at 18:34:50
In reply to Re: babble is my journal now » Dr. Bob, posted by HomelyCygnet on January 1, 2014, at 15:53:01
i think one of the reasons why posting helps me feel like i'm getting stuff out is that once i've gotten it out i don't have a great deal of control over it. i can't simply burn it or whatever. it is solid, in a sense. still there. so getting it out and moving on (in a sense) isn't doing it a disservice. i have some control over it in the sense that i can look back on it if i want. i do read the archives sometimes. writing, even. i... appreciate that that stuff is still there. accessible to me.
often i do write with bob in mind. but it isn't really bob... it is a blend... my last therapist... then my dbt therapist before that. the first therapist i had (when i could talk to her). my journal. who did i have in mind when i first started writing that? i don't know. i used to talk to (at) my father... until he left. i used to pray... hardest thing about not believing in god anymore was that i didn't have anyone to talk to...
the career thing that i used to fear f*ck*ng up... is gone now.
i wanted... for my mental health problems to be a secret part of myself that nobody knew about. i wanted... to be the same as everyone else. to be accepted into graduate school on my own merits. not given any special consideration for mental health issues. i wanted to get my phd on my own merits. get a job.
but that didn't work out.
along the way... i came to know many others... professors and graduate students and post-docs who had all kinds of physical and mental health issues. how these people... were accommodating and helpful. but still... i... i didn't know how to tell them about me. because i didn't know how to tell them what was wrong. because i didn't know what was wrong.
most of the stuff... on borderline personality (even linehan's stuff)... on trauma / abuse... on dissociation... none of that seemed quite right. it seemed... too personal. too shameful. i don't know. i don't know what to say. i didn't want my current colleagues or supervisors or future employers to be thinking of me... to be thinking of any of that...
the autistic spectrum thing fits. the neurodiversity thing fits. fits together perfectly, actually. that was my thesis... difference vs dysfunction... the concerns i have... simon baron-cohen... autism as empathy deficit (where APA says elsewhere about how our empathy is what makes us human). it isn't that you have this thing... that you hide... it is you... who you are... a blend of strengths and weaknesses... differences... i am still coming to terms.
perhaps this is why my supervisor told me to look to intellectual handicap. perhaps he knew / saw more than i gave him credit for. i'm sure it was blindingly obvious to everyone but me.
it's done now.
i told my supervisor that i was diagnosed as being on the spectrum and i am on supported living because of it. i was... basically chucked out of the last 2 techs... because i couldn't function in their high-stimulus environments. but i needed the experience... the time taken to work on my motor skills... to get my body moving again after so many years of disuse and injury... university... works well because people are more like me.
but medicine is a funny sort of middle ground, actually. last time i saw my friend... i realised a lot of the things about him that struck me as odd before... even... a bit wrong with him... are actually 'good social skills' things. a hangover from his having done med before hahahaha.
if i pretend to be normal (nothing wrong with me) as best i can then other people find there is something a little bit off about me that they can't quite place. if people know i'm on the spectrum... well... they tend to feel better disposed. a little sorry for me, perhaps. but then that puts me in a frame of mind of being especially kind to them and grateful to them. and... they step in to help me when they can see me freeze up... smoothing... helping. actual proper helping. not the 'why do you say you are helping when it hurts so much' sort of helping.
i will figure a way to say that i'm on the spectrum before my med interview. i will plan on saying something about this in the interview. about what i think i can bring to medicine because of this. about how i will need supports in my team because of this. right now... they are increasing the maaori and pacific island quotas because they are recognising the best way to deal with difference is to... incorporate it. part of the whole decentralization of power thing. maybe... maybe the time is come for people like me. whatever that means.
my philosophy thesis... i feel like i don't need to write it so much anymore. i'm seeing now... the blend of consumer advocacy and academic stuff... starting to come together in a more wholistic way. it isnt there yet. but there are clear articulate voices. people who can speak both languages. it is nice to see independent convergence. makes one feel like part of something greater. to have discovered the zeitgeist (or something) while being locked away in ones own head... trying to figure stuff out...
i should write it one day... but i don't need to. other people are doing good job of it. i need to integrate it into my life... i want to do medicine now. i want.
thanks for getting me thinking on such stuff. i appreciate it. value the ability to ask hard questions. so much of my life is shame... years ago... those questions would have filled me with shame. fears. i don't feel that anymore. those feelings so strongly. sorry i'm garbeled... time for me to get out for a bit.. take a shower. go for a walk.. it is a beautiful day.
i don't quite know what is up with you for your posting and 'don't care if i'm blocked' thing... except i do have a vague feeling of feeling something like that once. only... i figured it preferable to have more control (to see the block coming) than to try my best to be careful in what i said... to not say anything that would likely upset / offend etc and... get blocked anyway.
i value your input anyway.
Posted by Phillipa on January 1, 2014, at 20:22:08
In reply to Re: babble is my journal now, posted by alexandra_k on January 1, 2014, at 18:34:50
Alex I feel it's great that you can use babble as a journal. Please don't get stuck in the Autism Spectrum either as you are extremely intellectual and gifted to me. PJ
Posted by alexandra_k on January 4, 2014, at 18:59:37
In reply to Re: babble is my journal now, posted by Dr. Bob on December 31, 2013, at 15:29:53
thank you. i am glad that you are still here.
This is the end of the thread.
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