Shown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by susan47 on July 26, 2006, at 23:52:04
Why can't I let go of the sight of you,
You.
Hey. Hey you. (whispering) iluvyouiloveuiluvuIloveyou I love you
Yes. You.
Posted by susan47 on July 26, 2006, at 23:58:34
In reply to Why, posted by susan47 on July 26, 2006, at 23:52:04
I remember so clearly yet not ..
Not so.
Not, so clearly, at all ...
really. Really.
Because every time,
every god damn single time I see you
it's like a light goes on inside my soul,
inside my body, my spirit
wants to dance,
and play, and love you.
Love you forever.
Love you,
always. Always.
Allow me. I love you.
I love me.
I'm stoned as a bat.
And I don't care.
Because even though, even though I know
that tomorrow I can hate myself,
and I can feel badly,
I Won't.
Because life is meant to be lived.
I am an adult.
I choose to live Life.Hah.
Posted by Joan797 on July 27, 2006, at 7:52:09
In reply to Re: Why, posted by susan47 on July 26, 2006, at 23:58:34
Dearest Susan,
Would it ever be possible for you to not be near this person? Do you live in the same city, neighborhood? Is that why you keep running in to him? Would it be stupid of me to ask you...........have you ever considered moving, just to save your own sanity?? Or are your writings just reflections of past experience?
I know that in my own situation, things seem to ebb at times because I am not confronted with him or his image on a daily basis. However, in my own sick mind I seek out his image, just to see if I still feel the same way, and I do. I still get that stomach jumping thing whenever I see his picture. But I dont' have the option of driving by his house, seeing him on the street, going to the same bars, stores, etc that he does. If I lived in his area, I would be taking those options that would be unhealthy for me. Of course, according to him, if I was in his area, we would be together, which is a crock.............
It's just a thought, I don't really know how often you are seeing this person on the street, at the market, etc.....but it seems to be torturing you. I know it would torture me.
Posted by susan47 on July 27, 2006, at 13:26:36
In reply to Re: Why, posted by Joan797 on July 27, 2006, at 7:52:09
It's not a problem at all.
It's nice.
I like seeing him the once a year it seems to happen.
It's okay.
I still get excited, I still love the sight of him.
I always will I think.
I never had anything with him, with this person, not really.
I had a mind that made him out to be the perfect man, and he played into that very very well, partly because I never knew him, perhaps, and I suppose I never will and honestly, that doesn't hurt as much as it used to. I don't "need" him or anyone anymore. I'm fine now and I love to write about things that move me deeply. That's all. Joan, thank you for reading.A big hug for you sweetie. I know how impossible some men can be. I know how they will do anything sometimes, to feel good about themselves and it usually involves hurting a woman. I don't understand how some males can be so testosterone-laden and aggressive and hurtul and lying and deceitful. But it can happen. And it does. But, guess what? I'm free and clear now. I've been hurt for the last time. My heart belongs to ME. I OWN it, I OWN MYSELF. I own everything I am, everything I've done, and everything I will do.
Posted by Joan797 on July 28, 2006, at 0:00:10
In reply to No. And Thank you Joan » Joan797, posted by susan47 on July 27, 2006, at 13:26:36
You have reached a level of love, self love, and oneness with yourself that I can only read about and fear that I will never obtain. I do admire you so very much.
Posted by susan47 on July 28, 2006, at 1:01:13
In reply to Re: No. And Thank you Joan » susan47, posted by Joan797 on July 28, 2006, at 0:00:10
Goo ack egad and such. Live into the Admiration you see and feel, and Be That...
A zen thought? Whoa!!!
This is the end of the thread.
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