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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 19 of 19. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:05:31
I just got a letter from my grandmother. My mom's mom, who I've been very close to my entire life. She's concerned about me and said that she can't talk to me anymore because I won't listen and that I need to 'try harder' to overcome the depression and that I need to 'believe in the power of prayer' and so on and so forth.
I am so ANGRY right now I could SCREAM!!!!! She just doesn't get it and I wish she would just keep her thoughts to herself. Honestly, it makes me want to just go take all the pills I have and be done with it. Really. I won't right now, because I do have *some* hope, but I really really want to. I am SO fed up with everyone thinking they understand, with everyone giving me the same f%*$&@ pep talk that I have heard so many times it makes me want to puke!!!!! Honestly, I don't know how much more I can stand.
I can't talk to my 'best friend' anymore because she's constantly getting upset with me and because she does the same things - tells me how to beat the depression. And I can't talk to my mom either. AND my grandmother took a shot at my therapist and pdoc, both of who I trust with my life, by saying that there's only so much they can do for me (duh) and that she really really thinks I'm overmedicated and that my mind is playing tricks on me.
HUH????
She said I should listen to my body and realize that my pdoc is just human. I know he's human. If he wasn't human, he could probably just 'fix' me, quick and easy. But I have come so far in this. Things have gotten easier over time, though certainly not thanks to my family and friends.
Anyway, I'm just so frustrated right now I'm nearly in tears. Oh hell, I am in tears. Been sleeping all day then wake up to take the dogs for a walk and check the mail and there's that letter, and something told me to not read it now, that I knew the jist of it, but I didn't listen to that little voice. Wish I had... :-((
Perhaps I should check myself into the psych ward. My therapist said they have a good program.
And to think that my grandmother wanted me to come down for July 4th weekend. It really hurts me to have to not deal with her, because I'm always afraid something's going to happen to her and then what?? But I really just can't deal with her right now. Can't deal with any of them right now.
Penny
Posted by yesac on June 28, 2003, at 17:35:13
In reply to WHY????????, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:05:31
I'm sorry that you're so frustrated and pissed off right now.
Maybe you've mentioned this in another post, but what's going on with you're medication? Are you on something new or is something not working anymore, or... something else?
> Perhaps I should check myself into the psych ward. My therapist said they have a good program.If you really think that you are in danger to yourself, maybe it would be a good idea. Or is there any way you could get in touch with your therapist or psychiatrist? That is much less intimidating than going to the hospital I would think. Just please keep yourself safe.
Posted by fallsfall on June 28, 2003, at 19:11:14
In reply to WHY????????, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:05:31
They try to help, but they just don't understand.
Hmmmm. Maybe that is why all of my friends have mental illnesses - I've surrounded myself with people who understand!
We understand.
(((((Penny)))))
(I'm a big believer in hugs)
P.S. I belong to a Depression Support group that meets once a week. It is a room full of people who understand. Maybe there's a group near you. Sometimes people bring "support" people. Maybe you could bring your Grandmother.
Posted by Dinah on June 28, 2003, at 19:49:39
In reply to WHY????????, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:05:31
If you can't deal with them, don't. Chances are they'll never understand and you'll just hurt your head banging on that brick wall.
My mom (and dad actually) is like that. And I just draw lines in the sand. If you want to discuss that, I'll have to leave (hang up, whatever). Then I do it. I've found that they love me enough and want to maintain contact enough that they'll respect it, even if they do complain about me to each other and everyone else behind my back.
I guess it's harder with a grandma.
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 20:59:54
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » Penny, posted by yesac on June 28, 2003, at 17:35:13
> Maybe you've mentioned this in another post, but what's going on with you're medication? Are you on something new or is something not working anymore, or... something else?
Well, I was doing well for a long time (since about March or so, which is a long time for me), with only one *minor* dip a couple of months ago. But I have this constant feeling of tiredness, hard time staying awake all day thing. My gp doesn't seem all too concerned about it, though she has referred me to the sleep clinic at UNC, which I go to mid-July. My pdoc is much more concerned. And I've been having chronic headaches since age 10, which my pdoc is also more concerned with than my gp. But they had gotten better recently, until my descent into the Pit.
Anyway, since I had been doing well, my pdoc wanted to try me on a stimulant (I've already been on Provigil for the sleepiness, and it worked for a little while but then no more), to help keep me awake all day, at least until I see if I have an 'official' sleep disorder, so he tried me on Adderall XR. I was taking Geodon (I also take Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Lamictal and Levoxyl), but we stopped the Geodon and started the Adderall. Needless to say, my mood dropped quickly and I paged him and he took me off the Adderall and put me back on the Geodon, then, shortly after, we increased the Zoloft, and then, earlier this week, increased the Zoloft again. But, this time, to no avail. It had all been working so well for me until we started playing with them. I was doing 'well', though there was still a lot of room for improvement. But anyway...
>
> > Perhaps I should check myself into the psych ward. My therapist said they have a good program.
>
> If you really think that you are in danger to yourself, maybe it would be a good idea. Or is there any way you could get in touch with your therapist or psychiatrist? That is much less intimidating than going to the hospital I would think. Just please keep yourself safe.I just got back from a Walmart run (needed dog food!) and an ice cream trip to Maple View Farms, all while listening to Aerosmith (which, corny as it sounds, is the only thing sometimes that gets my mind off of things!), so I'm feeling better right now and somewhat creative. I'm getting ready to immerse myself in Harry Potter V, until I finish it (I have fewer than 100 pages) and then I may paint, or I may actually do yoga, which I haven't done in a while. I have only talked to my roommate very briefly today, and haven't talked to anyone else (thank god).
Anyway, I wanted to ask you, have you ever been to the depression support group in Carrboro, run by the Orange Co. Mental Health Association? I don't know much about it and don't know if it's any good, but thought I might give it a try. Don't know. The time of the meetings is not very convenient for me. Are there any other support groups in our area that you know of? I'm not aware of any...
I was in an intensive outpatient program in Charlotte last summer and I SO wish I was in one now, though I couldn't work my work schedule around it even if there was one. But group therapy was soooo helpful to me.
Thanks, yesac.
Penny
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 21:01:38
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » Penny, posted by yesac on June 28, 2003, at 17:35:13
Sorry - the above message is intended for you!
P
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 21:08:30
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » Penny, posted by fallsfall on June 28, 2003, at 19:11:14
> They try to help, but they just don't understand.
>
> Hmmmm. Maybe that is why all of my friends have mental illnesses - I've surrounded myself with people who understand!It's funny, ya' know - I don't know many people who have gone through what I've gone through, except folks I met either online (through this board, specifically) or folks I met in my group therapy group last summer. They (and you) all understand. I was just telling my therapist the other night how, even though everyone in group was severely depressed/suicidal, it was such a comforting place to be, because everyone knew what everyone else was going through, even if the circumstances were different.
My roommate right now THINKS she understands. She says she suffers from depression, and perhaps she does, but she refuses to see a pdoc and she only goes to therapy occasionally, and that's fine if that works for her, but she doesn't understand why I need the support I need from professionals. So, I don't talk about it anymore.
>
> We understand.
>
> (((((Penny)))))
>
> (I'm a big believer in hugs)THANKS!!!
>
> P.S. I belong to a Depression Support group that meets once a week. It is a room full of people who understand. Maybe there's a group near you. Sometimes people bring "support" people. Maybe you could bring your Grandmother.Well, my grandmother lives in Wilmington (about 2.5 hours away), so that won't happen, but good thought. I only know of one support group around here and they meet every other week, but I haven't been yet. I was just talking to someone at the hospital here about whether they have a depression support group (they don't) and how one might get started. So, we'll see. I wouldn't mind being instrumental in getting one up and running. It would give me a mission...
:-)
Thanks!
Penny
Posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 21:15:35
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » Penny, posted by Dinah on June 28, 2003, at 19:49:39
> If you can't deal with them, don't. Chances are they'll never understand and you'll just hurt your head banging on that brick wall.
>
> My mom (and dad actually) is like that. And I just draw lines in the sand. If you want to discuss that, I'll have to leave (hang up, whatever). Then I do it. I've found that they love me enough and want to maintain contact enough that they'll respect it, even if they do complain about me to each other and everyone else behind my back.
>
> I guess it's harder with a grandma.I have told them, especially recently, that I don't want to talk about it. That I have a therapist and a pdoc and I will talk to them, and if I want to talk to anyone else, I'll let you know. But right now, I don't want to talk to my family or my roommate. But, they just don't give up. Or, should I say, my roommate and my grandmother don't give up.
I guess it doesn't really surprise me that my grandma sent me that letter, but it still really frustrates me. Because now I don't even want to call her. And she just turned 75 and we've always been really close, but she doesn't get it. I know she's been through a lot, including my grandfather's suicide 2 years ago, but how she deals with things (and how my roommate deals with things) and how I deal with things are completely different. They don't understand why I can't just either (A) pray about it and let God handle it or (B) 'try harder' to overcome the depression. As though I'm sitting around letting it suck me in!!!! They don't understand the effort it takes for me to get out of bed every day, to go to work, to take a shower and get dressed and look presentable, to take my dogs outside and for a walk...all these things I'm doing that constitute 'functioning' - they don't understand that just functioning is a feat in and of itself!!!
Of course, I'm preaching to the choir here. You know what I mean.
I just have to put up my shield when I talk to them, make certain topics off limits, tell them what they want to hear and try to change the subject. Can't let this get to me..... >:-(
Thanks, Dinah.
P
Posted by yesac on June 29, 2003, at 12:17:47
In reply to Re: WHY????????, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 20:59:54
>
> Well, I was doing well for a long time (since about March or so, which is a long time for me), with only one *minor* dip a couple of months ago.Yeah, I've been doing "well" for about 3 weeks and that seems incredibly long to me. It's the longest period of time that I've stayed fairly okay in ages it seems like. "Well" of course being a very relative term.
> Anyway, since I had been doing well, my pdoc wanted to try me on a stimulant (I've already been on Provigil for the sleepiness, and it worked for a little while but then no more), to help keep me awake all day, at least until I see if I have an 'official' sleep disorder, so he tried me on Adderall XR. I was taking Geodon (I also take Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Lamictal and Levoxyl), but we stopped the Geodon and started the Adderall. Needless to say, my mood dropped quickly and I paged him and he took me off the Adderall and put me back on the Geodon, then, shortly after, we increased the Zoloft, and then, earlier this week, increased the Zoloft again. But, this time, to no avail. It had all been working so well for me until we started playing with them. I was doing 'well', though there was still a lot of room for improvement. But anyway...
That's too bad. I guess it is hard to ever know whether to leave well enough alone. I mean, who wants to be stuck with mediocre?
> I just got back from a Walmart run (needed dog food!) and an ice cream trip to Maple View Farms, all while listening to Aerosmith (which, corny as it sounds, is the only thing sometimes that gets
Sometimes those trips to walmart and other such things can be a real life-saver, literally. Sometimes not. Sometimes I'll end up feeling substantially better after going, other times I'll just fall right back down. I actually went to Walmart yesterday as well, but I just ended up feeling really frustrated and pissed off with so many people there, not being able to find a parking space (not to mention that some lady stole my spot - I had my directional on before she did but she turned in anyway - God did that piss me off!). And it made me depressed about money.
> only talked to my roommate very briefly today, and haven't talked to anyone else (thank god).
It's surprising sometimes how many days go by and I don't really talk to anyone. Yesterday, I only talked to a friend I visited in prison (we're penpals, he's actually on death row), and talked to my friend on the phone. Which is more than some other days. I don't even talk at all to my roomates most days.
> Anyway, I wanted to ask you, have you ever been to the depression support group in Carrboro, run by the Orange Co. Mental Health Association? Are there any other support groups in our area that you know of? I'm not aware of any...
I haven't gone. I know the director of the MHAOC so it would be somewhat of a problem for me. I haven't really looked into any others. Maybe I should. Have you asked your therapist for suggestions?
>
> I was in an intensive outpatient program in Charlotte last summer and I SO wish I was in one now, though I couldn't work my work schedule around it even if there was one. But group therapy was soooo helpful to me.I've been interested in group therapy and also the outpatient programs, but it seems difficult with work, which I would not want to give up. I was only in a group once briefly in college and I think maybe I wasn't really ready for it so it didn't help much. The only outpatient program I know of around here is Holly Hill, and I don't even know much about it. But it seems like there must be others.
>
> Thanks, yesac.Sure. It's kind of nice actually to be able to discuss local stuff!
Posted by yesac on June 29, 2003, at 12:38:19
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » fallsfall, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 21:08:30
> My roommate right now THINKS she understands. She says she suffers from depression, and perhaps she does, but she refuses to see a pdoc and she only goes to therapy occasionally, and that's fine if that works for her, but she doesn't understand why I need the support I need from professionals. So, I don't talk about it anymore.
I had/have that situation with some people, not many because I really don't open up with many to begin with. But my younger sister is quite supportive for the most part, except that she always has thought that I am overreacting or something. That I think my situation is worse than it is, that plenty of people are depressed like I am and it isn't that big of a deal. I've tried to hint at how serious it really is for me, but she just doesn't get it. This is also the girl who thinks that trying one medication is gonna do the trick. Maybe for some people...
My older sister understands a bit more, but still doesn't get it that none of the medications have done ANYTHING for me. She was like "what do you mean it doesn't work?". She's been on many, but gone off more because of side effects or other reasons, not that they didn't work.
Posted by tina on June 29, 2003, at 12:57:49
In reply to WHY????????, posted by Penny on June 28, 2003, at 17:05:31
I know exactly what you mean Penny. My family has that "mind over matter" attitude too and they are quite averse to the medication issue as well. They always say I'm too medicated and that all I need is to get busier and start thinking about someone else instead of myself so much.
I have to just look at them and try to understand that they come from a different generation. They didn't talk about depression and most didn't even know what it was really so they just grit their teeth and forged on. Sometimes that's possible but when it's a chemical imbalance, that's very hard to do. They don't understand chemical imbalances either. It's ignorance that makes them respond to you this way. They just don't understand and probably aren't willing to so try your best not to let their opinions get to you. They are caring in their own way eventhough it doesn't feel like it sometimes. They are frustrated that they can't help you and it comes out all wrong. It's YOu that has to take the steps to take care of yourself and you have a pdoc and meds and you are getting through each day the best you can so give yourself a little credit. That's a big accomplishment when you are depressed. Just see them for what they are and concentrate on your own health and happiness without regard to their opinions. (if you can......I know it's nearly impossible sometimes)
best wishes
tina
Posted by Penny on June 29, 2003, at 20:42:03
In reply to oh wow, this is long » Penny, posted by yesac on June 29, 2003, at 12:17:47
> > Anyway, I wanted to ask you, have you ever been to the depression support group in Carrboro, run by the Orange Co. Mental Health Association? Are there any other support groups in our area that you know of? I'm not aware of any...
>
> I haven't gone. I know the director of the MHAOC so it would be somewhat of a problem for me. I haven't really looked into any others. Maybe I should. Have you asked your therapist for suggestions?I actually did ask my therapist, but she wasn't aware of any other groups in the area, and the women's health information director at Women's Hospital wasn't aware of any either. I checked with the women's center and they didn't have any either. I dunno...
Posted by Penny on June 30, 2003, at 8:09:02
In reply to Re: WHY???????? » Penny, posted by tina on June 29, 2003, at 12:57:49
Posted by whiterabbit on July 1, 2003, at 15:15:22
In reply to Re: oh wow, this is long » yesac, posted by Penny on June 29, 2003, at 20:42:03
You can't expect other people to understand if they haven't gone through such a dreadful experience themselves. Although they mean well with their advice, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. I would stop trying to explain your condition to these people, who truly believe that you can be helped with mindless platitudes...
the "chin up, it can't be that bad" type stuff.
You don't have to sever your relationship with them, but neither do you have to discuss your mental condition and the medical treatment you're recieving for it. Save that conversation for people who are dealing with or have suffered from serious depression and mood disorders. You might be able to find a local nami chapter (formally, the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) by going to their website at www.nami.org - it's a great source of information and support.Your grandmother's attitude is a little mystifying when you consider that your grandfather killed himself. She of all people should know the devestating effects of serious depression...and incidentally, his suicide is a large red flag if this man was your biological grandfather. It points to a genetic connection that may be responsible for your own condition, which means that a)your depression has a biological source, meaning your brain chemistry is abnormal and b)you can and will respond to the proper psychiatric medications.
The most difficult part is the medication trials -
this is a real test of endurance. First your condition must be properly diagnosed, and then you and your psychiatrist must find the best medication (usually a combination) at the best dosage for your specific chemistry. Since most psych meds are not fast-acting, this trial period takes FOREVER and often you must deal with a host of side effects along the way. But I am here to tell you that once you've finally found the right medication for you, it's more than worth the terrible journey. Like most precious things, recovery is not easy - but it is within reach.Forgive your grandmother if you can. She grew up in another age, even if she's not elderly - most of these psychiatric medications were developed
fairly recently. Possibly your grandmother had to deal with some hard times, and it is true that what doesn't kill us will make us stronger. However, she's probably under the impression that your depression is a result of your external circumstances, when your grandmother is thinking that you really don't know how easy you have it.Unfortunately, severe depression is not usually the result of our personal circumstances, and many people don't understand that. While there certainly is a thing such as depression brought on by tragic events, this type of depression is a normal reaction and part of the process of grieving. This is not the same as being terribly depressed simply because you woke up alive that morning. This form of depression is much less understood and more lethal.
So there is your answer to why?? If you like, you can pass out copies of "Darkness Visible" by William...Styron, I believe. This award-winning author (he wrote "Sophie's Choice", among other
bestsellers) was brought down by his first serious depression fairly late in life, and came close to suicide before he began to recover. He describes the dark and hopeless world of depression better than anyone else I've read, and the book is not long.My aren't I the chatty one! Penny, you are headed in the right direction. Don't let ANYONE talk you out of taking your medication. I know for a fact, an absolute fact, that I would be dead without medication - and no amount of therapy or prayer or chicken-soup-for-the-soul type advice would have saved me...I was much too far gone for any of that, racing at top speed towards self-destruction. Medication brought me back.
-Gracie
Posted by Penny on July 1, 2003, at 15:41:31
In reply to Why??, posted by whiterabbit on July 1, 2003, at 15:15:22
I totally agree. I have seen what meds can do, and I'm just hoping to get back there. Not that I've ever been where I would like to someday be, but at least I was able to function well enough to work toward that goal. I truly believe my pdoc is fantastic and is on the right track and I totally trust him. He's no where near ready to give up and I'm not either - not yet, anyway.
Of course, today is a good day. Tomorrow my whole outlook could change.
My grandfather's suicide actually had some other circumstances surrounding it other than depression - primarily that he had been accused of molesting my four-year-old cousin, and her mother (my first cousin) began having memories of him molesting her as a child also. It nearly tore our family apart - as it stands, my cousin and her children are estranged from the family, and I don't know where I stand in the whole thing. On one hand, there's never ANY excuse for what he did (which he all but admitted to in his suicide note), and I am filled with anger toward him both for that and for not facing up to it but instead taking his life and leaving my grandmother at the same time. On the other hand, my cousin, who, for good reason I suppose, is seriously screwed up and doesn't take care of her children and now won't let my grandmother see them, even though she claims to not know anything about what happened. And I question my grandmother's ignorance of the whole situation, but my therapist agreed that sometimes people can be oblivious to things they just don't want to believe. But I don't know... I still have a hard time imagining my grandfather as a child molester. I was pretty close to him.
But, yes, having a suicide in my family increases my risk of suicide. Top it off with my parents' substance abuse, which I truly think is their way of self-medicating, especially with my mom, and it's no wonder why I suffer from depression. I have suffered from depression since I was about 10 years old. My entire life changed that year.
I don't expect them to understand - b/c, as you said, in order for them to understand, they would have to have been there, and I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. At the same time, I do wish they would accept what I say is true - why would I lie about such a thing?
I suppose I am just very outspoken, usually, about my depression and treatment, in hopes of educating others. My grandmother herself has been on Celexa, Paxil and Zoloft, all prescribed by her internist. She just went off of Zoloft and says she can't tell a difference. I've tried explaining to her that perhaps she wasn't suffering from depression to begin with (she asked her doc about the meds), or perhaps she wasn't adequately medicated. I've told her how it's not likely that a person will just magically respond to one medication, unlike what the pharm companies would like for you to believe.
I am in the process of looking for a support group. Not sure what we have around here, which is a little dismaying considering this is a college town, but I am also talking to some folks about possibly starting a new depression support group through the women's hospital here. It would be a good thing to have, I think.
Haven't read that book, but I'll give it a look.
I did talk to my grandmother today and essentially we agreed to just not discuss my treatment anymore, and we agreed to disagree on what is the best course for me to take. So, hopefully that will be the end of that...???
Thanks.
Penny
Posted by whiterabbit on July 1, 2003, at 19:05:41
In reply to Re: Why?? » whiterabbit, posted by Penny on July 1, 2003, at 15:41:31
If you have the energy to get together a support group, I think it would be a wonderful and extremely useful purpose in your life - who knows how many other people you might help? At this point in my life, I'm becoming aware of the spiritual importance in such actions (or maybe that's just "crazy talk" but...I don't think so).
When you throw out such a good act into the cosmos, it has a ripple effect - your desire to help others has an energy that reaches much further than we can imagine.If anyone doubts this, they can't deny that a harmful action has the same rippling effect, as in the case of your grandfather. Both his perversion and suicide caused a great deal of pain and did much damage, the effects of which are still being felt today by your family. What a terrible legacy to leave behind...
You seem to be doing quite well, despite everything you've had to overcome. Having a good psychiatrist is a tremendous first step...the more skilled he is at finding the clues in your psyche which lead to an accurate diagnosis, the better your chance for recovery. I've had psychiatrists that couldn't find a Coke in a six-pack of Budweiser, and that's a frightening experience. So you're well on your way once you've found a really good doctor that you trust.
So take heart...
Gracie
Posted by Penny on July 1, 2003, at 21:26:52
In reply to Support group » Penny, posted by whiterabbit on July 1, 2003, at 19:05:41
Yes, not sure I have the energy at the moment, but it was something I wanted to do while in Charlotte, as there was only one depression/manic depression support group in the area that I was aware of and when I attempted to find the meeting one night, I was unable to! The meeting was a church, but there were no signs, nothing. I had even spoken to someone on the phone about it. I wasn't feeling all too well that night anyway, and after going through trying to find the meeting that wasn't, I was extremely frustrated and close to tears. Not a good thing for someone with depression!!!
So, as I said, I'm looking for something around here, but I would want a group that was well run and organized. If it were supported by the women's hospital here at UNC, it would be a good thing, not to mention the ready-made audience in the neurosciences hospital next door.
I think it's a need that must be fulfilled.
I hope you're right about the ripple effect in the universe. I have a need to help others - always have. Used to volunteer (was a mentor in Charlotte for a little boy in a residential psychiatric treatment facility), but haven't been doing any volunteering since coming to Chapel Hill due to lack of time and energy. Starting a support group, if I could do it, would meet multiple needs I have in my life and hopefully help others.
Just hoping my optimism today lasts.
thanks, Gracie!
Penny
Posted by noa on July 1, 2003, at 21:40:22
In reply to Re: Why?? » whiterabbit, posted by Penny on July 1, 2003, at 15:41:31
With that skeleton in the family closet, so to speak, it occurs to me that maybe the need to deny reality is all the more powerful--secrets, intolerance for the truth, etc. would add pressure to sweep the depression under the rug, too. I would bet that your grandmother is never going to understand.
Posted by Penny on July 1, 2003, at 21:58:00
In reply to Re: Why?? » Penny, posted by noa on July 1, 2003, at 21:40:22
Oh yes - the desire to deny what happened runs strong through the family. I am the 2nd oldest of four grandchildren, and my older cousin has two children (the younger of which was the one abused). My older cousin and I were very close while growing up, but we don't even talk anymore after she couldn't understand my questioning anything that happened. I have yet to get straight answers from anyone, and I wouldn't have even known what was in the suicide note if my great aunt, who was one of the only people to read the note, hadn't told me. My grandmother has said many times that she wishes she had just destroyed that note before anyone else saw it. I can understand why it's so hard for her to ignore the truth, as it's a really really ugly truth, but her denial has spilled over onto the other family members. My cousin's father is my mom's older brother, and I don't even know what he thinks of this whole thing. He's the only one in the family who ever sees her or her kids, and that's not very frequently. My grandmother has remarked that she wonders how he feels knowing that most of my family sees her as a troublemaker, black sheep of the family, and liar.
Yep - nothin' but denial.
And it makes it just that much harder to tackle the depression issue.
This is the end of the thread.
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