Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 901600

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Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » Dinah

Posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 22:54:32

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71, posted by Dinah on June 17, 2009, at 21:30:06

Well the 'unique' quality was that I trusted him before I met him (which was reaffirmed when I saw how professional he was and how he did not get out prescription pad even once yet). This psychiatrist's son was one of my former doctors, though only 3 times (thru military). Son tried to hook me up w/dad about a year or 2 ago, but dad wasn't on military insurance list (no good PDocs are) His son left a lasting impression on me. I know he is not his son, but what I felt from his son moved me so much, that it led me to his father.

When I called to see him, I told psychiatrist father that I knew his son, and this was why I sought treatment with him. I told this psychiatrist I trusted him completely during our first meeting.

Dinah, given what you say below, I can only say I highly doubt it. He is extremely professional. That is why I'm so confused - this is the main issue: if my strong attachment is the issue, then I think he would have said something like "I am not going to be practicing long enough to complete a course of treatment..blah blah blah and given your strong attachment, transferrence...." His not being straight up with me is what is strange.

So maybe the rheumatologist was a mistake, but how could he get doctors mixed up? Maybe he is sick-I saw boxes in his office and piles of folders and stuff like he was moving. How could this have changed from 3 weeks ago though? Well this thought came from 1st therapist who had pancreatic cancer when he took me on, and we only were together 5 sessions are so. I'm sad to think those thoughts, but this reminds me of that. But 3 weeks ago...he took me on as a new patient?

"Given what you've said about his strange referrals, I wonder if he is having some sort of issues that may have bled into your experience with him. Because what you describe today seems a bit odd, with rheumatology referrals. Maybe the rheumatologist has a son? Or a dual specialty?"

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me

Posted by BirdSong on June 17, 2009, at 22:55:35

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by BirdSong on June 17, 2009, at 22:15:15

Ok....perhaps I should just say it.

1) You said he was old.
2) You wanted psychodynamic therapy. Whether that is the best method right now for you is subject for debate....(which I would be happy to discuss at another time)

...BUT.....he was coming from a psychodynamic perspective, therefore.....

3) Quick "attachment"...intense attachment as you displayed immediately can signify "certain diagnoses," which require more intensive therapy

4) Additionally these same issues can require long-term therapy...years.

From the perspective he was coming from and from what you shared and the issues that came up, Garnet, he did the right thing. He actually probably saved you from getting hurt later on when you got really into therapy and he had to retire or cut his hours back or .....

This has NOTHING to do with you, but has to do with the limitations of him as a T.

=====
For example: You know I work with teens/kids. You know I do DBT with them. What you don't know is that I limit my practice to only a certain number of DBT clients at a time. So I have 'X' number of teens in DBT and 'X' number of kids that are further along doing other therapy.......MY colleagues take 'X' number of DBT clients and 'X' number of other kids as well...

It is not because of the clients...If I could I would take them all. But because there are only so many hours in the day and so many days of the week that I can work....and be "at my best."

Another example....
Now, assume I get chronically ill and I can only keep working with the kids I currently have (I usually work with kids 1-4 years)..I cant take anymore no matter how much potential or "connection" or anything we have, because the chronic illness tires me out more quickly.

It's not because of the clients....it is because T's are human....

There is a T out there for you. Trust me.
And there is one that is going to love working through transference etc, if that is what you want....

He did you a favor...(not about the selection of referrals he gave you, but about his decision)

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » emmanuel98

Posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 23:06:31

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by emmanuel98 on June 17, 2009, at 21:14:21

In all fairness to this p-doc, he didn't "induce" your attachment"

The thing is, if he wasn't trying to get a specific reaction from me, if we were merely discussing history, he wouldn't have put on blank state AND he wouldn't have stripped me of my defense mechanisms to expose my unconscious. As this was happening, he would specifically stop me w/the emergence of each defense mechanism (joking about past, intellectualizing, etc.), forcing me to recognize it while he further dismantled them by saying stuff that made me stop doing it. The defense mechanisms dissappeared. He was doing this-I was merely talking.

If he wasn't trying to get me in that state, he would not have 1) done blank state; 2) dismantled defense mechanisms.

I felt like I was in an altered state of consciouness-a trance like state. If he was merely trying to get my history, rather than promote transference, it seems very odd he would do this.

And the fact that the wrong number was the male doctor, who is actually a pediatric rheumatologist, after I dismissed the female, forces me to call him back.

So still-nothing makes sense. Grrrrrrrrr!!!

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me

Posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 23:09:56

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by BirdSong on June 17, 2009, at 22:55:35

Yes, it does make sense now that you explained that.

He is actually an old-school psychoanalyst who does ecceltic approaches (like psychodynamic therapy).

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » BirdSong

Posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 23:11:46

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by BirdSong on June 17, 2009, at 22:55:35

Oh-the intense psycotherapy was his idea, not mine. I never knew anything about this type of therapy. He told me on the first day that's what i needed. Maybe like you said, the strong attachment led him to believe he could not provide what I needed.

Thanks

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 17, 2009, at 23:25:55

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 22:40:56

Sounds like you are in a better place. I'm really glad to hear it, Garnet.

> Thanks for straightening me out with the terminology I had mistaken, and for the support. I don't know. I thought the attachment was necessary for that type of therapy.
>
> Oh, he did not say anything about "buried" psychosis at all, that was my thought... I was just trying to figure out why all of the sudden he couldn't treat me, and thought maybe he realized today I had issues more serious than he originally thought.
>
> He is extremely professional though, moreso than any pdoc or therapist I've been too. It seems odd he wouldn't tell me straight up why he couldn't see me. He told me the first time we met, I needed intensive psychotherapy. I dont' see how this meeting today changed that, or why he would even see new patients if he couldn't provide therapy. Come to think of it, I do believe when I called him iniitially, he said he's not one for psychopharmacology but could help give me advice on other doctors to see when I told him about my situation (PDoc dumped me after I asked for Dextrat) and to come see him to discuss.
>
> I don't know why he would do all that blank state stuff though if he didn't want the strong transference. And no, I still think he induced it, or at least encouraged it. If he was just giving me advice, he wouldn't have been like that; instead, he would have just talked to me normal about treatment types, meds, my childhood history, etc.
>
> Yes, Amelia, I had PTSD; I don't know if I 'have' it anymore (if it goes away or if its something you have forever).
>
> I'm trying to do my howmework still. I'll talk to him tomorrow.
>

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » BirdSong

Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 17, 2009, at 23:40:04

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by BirdSong on June 17, 2009, at 22:15:15

I should not have used the terms interchangeably, as psychodynamic theory comes out of psychoanalysis. But you are dead wrong to describe transference and the unconscious as being a part of psychodynamics and not psychoanalytics, as it was Freud, who built his original system of psychology on notions of the unconscious and subconscious, etc. That he abandoned his work on the unconscious later doesn't mitigate that fact. Period.

Yes, the diagnosis of the individual does to some extent affect the treatment recommendation, but you are wrong to say that CBT is for depression, and that "we know" DBT is excellent for BPD (and by extension, nothing else). Studies have demonstrated efficacy for DBT in populations that have a primary diagnosis of anxiety, and of depression, and even of addiction. Most DBT groups these days are populated by people without a diagnosis of BPD (and that's based on research, education, and personal experience). CBT is used for anxiety and depression too. Both are being used for the treatment of schizophrenia. Your information about these modalities reads as needing an update. One of the four modules in DBT is on interpersonal effectiveness--that would generally be the go to modality for psychologists presented with a client who needs help in the social sphere.

Moreover, in most of the psychology world, you would be hard pressed to find psychologists who use the psychodynamic framework AT ALL, so that it isn't ever a question whether to use those concepts or modalities. In fact, my experience in grad school, typical of most US grad schools, is that psychologists find psychodynamics laughable. That is not my personal opinion. I am not making that statement. So don't shoot the messenger.

I stand by my recommendation that Garnet steer clear of psychodynamics and analysis. You may not like it, but I'm not asking you to.

> There is a difference between psychoanalytic and psychodynamic and I would be careful when warning against running from psychodynamic therapy.
>
> The diagnosis of an individual (don't read label) has alot to do with searching for the "most effective" and scientifically proven therapy. For example, for PTSD, we know that EMDR is excellent in processing traumatic memories. For BPD, we know that DBT is excellent and object relations is good as well. For depression, CBT can be utilized quickly and provides excellent results.....
> ....However, for those looking for improvements in relationships, psychodynamic therapy can be wonderful....for those with eating disorders, psychodynamic therapy combined with CBT is what is suggested...etc., etc., etc.
>
> Psychodynamic is much different then psychoanalytic; involves a relationship, involves working through transferences, and brings unconscious feelings into conscious awareness. These have a purpose and can provide excellent insight if done with the right therapist.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong

Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 18, 2009, at 0:19:47

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » BirdSong, posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 17, 2009, at 23:40:04

Hmmm...okay, I saw your posts on Social about DBT. They demonstrate that you do understand that DBT can be used for diagnoses other than BPD. That understanding didn't come through at all in your reply to me. And while I thought you were unnecessarily harsh with Deneb, I agree that stigmas exist even within communities of people with mental illness.

What did come through is that you are a treatment provider. I'm not sure why you post here regularly, I don't know your story, but understand that some of us also have advanced education in psychology, even if we are not practicing therapists.

And since this board since heavily tilted toward psychodynamic approaches, I am going to continue to post about other modalities. Informed consumer = empowered consumer.

> I should not have used the terms interchangeably, as psychodynamic theory comes out of psychoanalysis. But you are dead wrong to describe transference and the unconscious as being a part of psychodynamics and not psychoanalytics, as it was Freud, who built his original system of psychology on notions of the unconscious and subconscious, etc. That he abandoned his work on the unconscious later doesn't mitigate that fact. Period.
>
> Yes, the diagnosis of the individual does to some extent affect the treatment recommendation, but you are wrong to say that CBT is for depression, and that "we know" DBT is excellent for BPD (and by extension, nothing else). Studies have demonstrated efficacy for DBT in populations that have a primary diagnosis of anxiety, and of depression, and even of addiction. Most DBT groups these days are populated by people without a diagnosis of BPD (and that's based on research, education, and personal experience). CBT is used for anxiety and depression too. Both are being used for the treatment of schizophrenia. Your information about these modalities reads as needing an update. One of the four modules in DBT is on interpersonal effectiveness--that would generally be the go to modality for psychologists presented with a client who needs help in the social sphere.
>
> Moreover, in most of the psychology world, you would be hard pressed to find psychologists who use the psychodynamic framework AT ALL, so that it isn't ever a question whether to use those concepts or modalities. In fact, my experience in grad school, typical of most US grad schools, is that psychologists find psychodynamics laughable. That is not my personal opinion. I am not making that statement. So don't shoot the messenger.
>
> I stand by my recommendation that Garnet steer clear of psychodynamics and analysis. You may not like it, but I'm not asking you to.
>
>
>
> > There is a difference between psychoanalytic and psychodynamic and I would be careful when warning against running from psychodynamic therapy.
> >
> > The diagnosis of an individual (don't read label) has alot to do with searching for the "most effective" and scientifically proven therapy. For example, for PTSD, we know that EMDR is excellent in processing traumatic memories. For BPD, we know that DBT is excellent and object relations is good as well. For depression, CBT can be utilized quickly and provides excellent results.....
> > ....However, for those looking for improvements in relationships, psychodynamic therapy can be wonderful....for those with eating disorders, psychodynamic therapy combined with CBT is what is suggested...etc., etc., etc.
> >
> > Psychodynamic is much different then psychoanalytic; involves a relationship, involves working through transferences, and brings unconscious feelings into conscious awareness. These have a purpose and can provide excellent insight if done with the right therapist.
>
>

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP

Posted by BirdSong on June 18, 2009, at 1:56:19

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong, posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 18, 2009, at 0:19:47

First of all, I started to come here like everyone else a couple of months ago, looking for a place to talk about my therapy experience, because I am a client with a therapist who does a very unique form of therapy. I actually post infrequently until recently when I responded to and posted in a couple threads.
But I am also a child psychologist who did my dissertation evaluating modes of treatment for children with attachment disorders and "difficult diagnoses". I work almost entirely with children who are wards of the state.

1) I never said that psychoanalytic therapy did not involve unconscious and transference. In fact if you note my first post to Garnet, I posted that Transference Neurosis is specifically a component of psychoanalytic therapy and not psychodynamic therapy. However, psychoanalytic therapy is very different than psychodynamic therapy. Reread my first post.

2) I am not going to talk anymore about DBT. I have trained from Linehan and her organization. I work in organized DBT circles and have been practicing DBT for over 10 years.

3) http://health.usnews.com/blogs/on-parenting/2009/06/04/prevent-depression-in-teens-with-cognitive-behavioral-therapy.html
This study reports the results from a recent study from Vanderbilt University reported in JAMA that basically discusses the success of CBT for depression. There are tons of others going back many years. This one focuses on teens.

4) I will not respond regarding Deneb anymore. I suggest you look at the pattern and behaviors. And if so many are aware of psychology, they should then recognize that they are feeding the cycle and not helping.

I had privately spoken with Garnet, so I responded to her experience. However, I have asked NUMEROUS times for my account to be deleted......so your concern regarding hearing my story or why I come here, should not be a concern anymore.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP » BirdSong

Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 18, 2009, at 2:09:35

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP, posted by BirdSong on June 18, 2009, at 1:56:19

There is so much to say, but in the interest of civility, I will restrict my comment to this: there is a difference between not feeding someone's symptoms and providing them with the equivalent of tough love. Tough love was bad in the 80s and, thank god, no one talks about tough love any more, except in boot camps, and we know how great a treatment they are. I would not present someone with all their past posts as though to win a point. Boundaries can be set without hurting a person. I didn't see any GIVE in that DEAR MAN you gave.

You have every right to post here. I was just confused about why, since it seemed like you were posting as a therapist, and then, to me, as an expert on the mountain, which, in a context where we are providing peer support, would seem to me to confuse people who have probably experienced a lot of squishy boundaries already.

Your choice to leave. That is not what I was asking you to do, at all.


> First of all, I started to come here like everyone else a couple of months ago, looking for a place to talk about my therapy experience, because I am a client with a therapist who does a very unique form of therapy. I actually post infrequently until recently when I responded to and posted in a couple threads.
> But I am also a child psychologist who did my dissertation evaluating modes of treatment for children with attachment disorders and "difficult diagnoses". I work almost entirely with children who are wards of the state.
>
> 1) I never said that psychoanalytic therapy did not involve unconscious and transference. In fact if you note my first post to Garnet, I posted that Transference Neurosis is specifically a component of psychoanalytic therapy and not psychodynamic therapy. However, psychoanalytic therapy is very different than psychodynamic therapy. Reread my first post.
>
> 2) I am not going to talk anymore about DBT. I have trained from Linehan and her organization. I work in organized DBT circles and have been practicing DBT for over 10 years.
>
> 3) http://health.usnews.com/blogs/on-parenting/2009/06/04/prevent-depression-in-teens-with-cognitive-behavioral-therapy.html
> This study reports the results from a recent study from Vanderbilt University reported in JAMA that basically discusses the success of CBT for depression. There are tons of others going back many years. This one focuses on teens.
>
> 4) I will not respond regarding Deneb anymore. I suggest you look at the pattern and behaviors. And if so many are aware of psychology, they should then recognize that they are feeding the cycle and not helping.
>
> I had privately spoken with Garnet, so I responded to her experience. However, I have asked NUMEROUS times for my account to be deleted......so your concern regarding hearing my story or why I come here, should not be a concern anymore.

 

Article on CBT for depressed teens » BirdSong

Posted by jane d on June 18, 2009, at 5:36:08

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP, posted by BirdSong on June 18, 2009, at 1:56:19

>
> 3) http://health.usnews.com/blogs/on-parenting/2009/06/04/prevent-depression-in-teens-with-cognitive-behavioral-therapy.html
> This study reports the results from a recent study from Vanderbilt University reported in JAMA that basically discusses the success of CBT for depression. There are tons of others going back many years. This one focuses on teens.

I found the description in the linked article annoyingly vague. Here's the abstract itself which isn't much better.
http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/abstract/301/21/2215

Neither says how the outcome was measured. Self report and unspecified clinical diagnosis. Of course in depression that's also based on self report. And therein lies the problem with this study and tons of others.

The USNews blurb about the study described cbt as follows.

"Thus if people change how they think about a situation and how they respond to it, they can feel better, even if the situation hasnt changed."

The problem is that it's so easy to teach people to change how they REPORT thinking about a situation and that will change how they score on most checklists used to diagnose depression. Voila! Instant cure.

Perhaps that isn't how depression was measured this time. The abstract doesn't say. It would certainly make a nice change.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP » BirdSong

Posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 5:59:03

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong((ASP, posted by BirdSong on June 18, 2009, at 1:56:19

>However, I have asked NUMEROUS times for my account to be deleted......so your concern regarding hearing my story or why I come here, should not be a concern anymore.

Please don't leave.

:-(


- Scott

 

Re: Article on CBT for depressed teens

Posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 6:09:12

In reply to Article on CBT for depressed teens » BirdSong, posted by jane d on June 18, 2009, at 5:36:08

I think the true results of CBT are cumulative. It is not the successful reframing of a single event that produces change in depression scores, but the gradual improvement in core beliefs that comes from repeated reframings. It is a top-down therapy rather than a bottom up therapy. Results come rapidly because the automatic negative thoughts are extinguished so quickly. This, in turn, starts the process of improving one's self-esteem as intermediate beliefs become more positive.

It works for me, anyway.


- Scott

 

can you please talk about CBT on another thread?

Posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 8:08:30

In reply to Re: Article on CBT for depressed teens, posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 6:09:12

Sorry, I know we change subjects on threads all the time, but i feel in crisis and am somehow feeling upset by seeing all the CBT posts and some discussions in this thread about negative things about the type of therapy i'm in...please....

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) » Amelia_in_StPaul

Posted by Nadezda on June 18, 2009, at 8:21:06

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't ) Birdsong, posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 18, 2009, at 0:19:47

Amelie, how can you suggest that someone else not post here-- for any reason?

I appreciate anyone's knowledge and experience-- and to be honest, if someone is a psychologist, they have a lot to offer us in terms of understanding of what we're dealing with and giving us insight into the other side of the fence-- how the world may look to the "other person" we're always imagining things about.

Moreover, I've found Birdsong's posts valuable and helpful-- even we lurkers can get a lot from reading posts and responses here-- and I can't imagine why you would disinvite a helpful person from posting.

If you feel that anyone has violated civility norms, there are steps you can take. But please don't say things like "I'm not sure why you post here regularly..."

Birdsong posts here for the same reason that everyone does-- they have something they want to communicate and wish to benefit from and/or to contribute to the discussion--

no one needs any further reason-- or justification --

gosh. the more there are thoughtful and knowledgeable people, the more we grow. If you don't think someone's adequately informed as to your or our advanced educations-- feel free to inform them-- but don't imply that they aren't welcome.

Nadezda


 

Re: can you please talk about CBT on another thread? » garnet71

Posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 8:48:08

In reply to can you please talk about CBT on another thread?, posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 8:08:30

> Sorry, I know we change subjects on threads all the time, but i feel in crisis and am somehow feeling upset by seeing all the CBT posts and some discussions in this thread about negative things about the type of therapy i'm in...please....

Yes. Absolutely. I'm glad you said something.

I hope you are able to resolve things as quickly and painlessly as possible.


- Scott

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by sassyfrancesca on June 18, 2009, at 8:52:22

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » BirdSong, posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 23:11:46

Garnet; I don't know much about it, but I think regression therapy can be very DANGEROUS. I don't understand the thinking behind that. I would NEVER let anyone do that to me.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by antigua3 on June 18, 2009, at 10:16:59

In reply to New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me, posted by garnet71 on June 17, 2009, at 19:55:30

I can't tell you how sorry I am that this is happening to you, that you thought you found someone you could trust and feel safe with enough to open up so quickly. It must be terribly painful for you to feel abandoned so quickly.

Please don't give up. Find another T. They will help you through this. It's common for the goal with a new T is to work through such issues with an old one.

It sounds like to me that he evaluated you, and you got really sucked in, and then he decided because of his own reasons--his issues, not yours--that he couldn't treat you.

I know you feel like he "induced" the transference with you, but please try to consider that you were sucked into it by his whole manner of caring, etc. But you can experience this with another T. I think you really need to try. I know you think he was "perfect" for you, but he is admitting that he can't be, which is a good thing for a T to do instead of lead you on.

I know this, because I've experienced it. I had a male T once agree to treat me for 18 months (the amount of time was irrelevant) and I found myself openng up to him, which I never do with a male, except with the pdoc I have now. I spilled my guts. Then, one day out of the blue, right before my 18 months were to begin, he called me in and told me he couldn't treat me, that he was referring me out to someone else. He never gave me any reason, and wouldn't accept responsibility for having agreed to treat me. I was horrified and it took me a very long time to get over the abandonment. What had I done to make him change his mind? I'll never know, but I do realize now that it was about him, and not me, and he was a complete coward.

But I did get over it. I really encourage you to find someone new to talk to. Find new references and just try it. Please?
antigua

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » antigua3

Posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 11:00:19

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71, posted by antigua3 on June 18, 2009, at 10:16:59

Antigua, how nice of you to share with me. Yes, just as you said, he was 'perfect' for me. I know you understand since something similar, though unique, happened to you. It is so painful.

We had a really nice talk this morning. He had this plan for me before I even came in yesterday and told him about the attachment. He said he never once thought I had any psychosis, and the attachment had absolutely nothing to do with his decision. He said how I took to him WAS unusually intense and quick, but that did not change anything since he already made the decision before I told him all that. He said the whole thing is his age. He's 70. He looks a lot younger, so maybe he thinks I think he is younger though I googled him, but the whole situation is he couldn't be there for me for the time I needed in the course of treatment.

The female he referred me to is in training. He said my insurance would never pay for this type of treatment and that she would work with me anyway. it was inferred the rheumatologist md is in training too, from the things told to me. He has some published research on psychology in conjunction w/childhood illness, i guess this is his area of interest now. It takes many years to become a psychoanalysist, much more in addition to becoming a psychiatrist (which is just one reason why I think so many mental health professionals are against it-just me thinking out loud) and I think this doctor is overseeing people who are in the process of becoming analysts. I can see why some people want to keep the practice from dying out; maybe he is one of them.

He said some endearing things to me and also he said he thought I'm extremely intelligent and really have made good for myself despite all the trauma and have good coping skills and basically that he is putting me on a path to reach my full potential, but it will take time and 3-5 times per week. After we spoke, I felt incredibily bonded to him-but not through the transference, but as 2 humnan beings.

He never even asked for my insurance card or info after all this time, and he just called in my scripts and said he will mail the sch. II one to me. Thinking back, when I initially spoke to him, the plan was to find people who could help me-doctors, therapists, whoever would be best for what I needed. I don't know how it got in my mind I was even his patient to begin with. The whole thing was supposed to be more like my consulting him to determine the best course of treatment, to help me.

It's just so strange how this mirrors my real life-becoming attached to my father, who was totally unavailable my whole life, basically abandoned and left to depend upon my mother and it went from there...He is really persuading me to see this woman, and I will call her. he said she is really great and that I should just give her a chance and that it is imperative I tell her everything I've told him; he really emphasized that. Even when I showed up at his office extremely anxious yesterday, the chairs and tables were moved, his demeanor to me totally different, the lights different, everything. And he acted sort of like he didn't care about me all of the sudden, nonchalantly; it seemed odd he only asked me a few questions he had already asked me last week-questions of major milestones in my life as if he forgot. he takes a lot of notes, so it was a little odd. Like childhood - having no security and dealing with being abandonded by father with the dynamics of the house changed when my parents marraige fell apart, the uneasy atmosphere, and all the uncomfortablness when that happend-then being forced to depend on my mother. It is so strange hos this is mirroring my real life, I guess I can accept it better thinking that way.

But I am grieving for him. I never had a father figure, never had grandfathers, never in my life trusted a man like I trusted him. He is a true gem--extremely skilled, professional, dedicated, intelligent, and compassionate. It seems like a once in a lifetime opportunity to be his patient, so its not just the transference attachment that is getting me, its the rational part of the situation too in finding the right psychiatrist and therapist.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » antigua3

Posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 11:19:25

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71, posted by antigua3 on June 18, 2009, at 10:16:59

Oh-he said his treament recommendation was based on all my strengths--not any perceived 'weakness'.

Antigua, sorry you never got a direct reason for that T to decline treating you. I can see why some docs would refuse treating a patient-maybe something in your situation reminded him of his own issues and thus would be a conflict of interest so to speak. There are so many things I could think of concerning the analysts own issues...things from religion to similarities to their own traumas could prevent them from being neutral. And analystis have to undergo psychoanlaysis themselves and their cases are supervised. It's highly governed and I can see why since it is a powerful thing and dangers could happen if not monitored closely. I just wish you could have gotten the answers at the time.....

In my case, I realize this doctor already gave me a direct answer. You were totally right-he was just trying to evaluate me to see how I could be helped--and I got extremely sucked in by the overwhelming trust and how he was a perfect fit for me. You are absolutely right.

it just blew my mind that I had more insight from 45 minutes with him than years of therapy. And also that I felt anxiety manifesting in my body, and could place it as repressed thoughts, and it totally changed to grief and left my body. I can even visualize the feelings it was so powerful.

This type of therapy is defintely what will allow me to realize my full potential. I jsut hope i can find someone i connect with like him; i don't think it will ever be the same as with him.

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by Amelia_in_StPaul on June 18, 2009, at 12:26:48

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » antigua3, posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 11:00:19

He sounds like a really, really nice, sweet, intelligent guy. I am sorry this isn't going to work for you. I know what I somewhat controversially suggested (run away from this), but I just want to say that I still support you and your decision and I hope it all works out for you. If he recommends the woman strongly, and you can get basically what amounts to free therapy (if I read correctly), then it's worth a try. One door closes/another opens. Sorry I accidentally hijacked your thread. All best wishes...Amelia


> Antigua, how nice of you to share with me. Yes, just as you said, he was 'perfect' for me. I know you understand since something similar, though unique, happened to you. It is so painful.
>
> We had a really nice talk this morning. He had this plan for me before I even came in yesterday and told him about the attachment. He said he never once thought I had any psychosis, and the attachment had absolutely nothing to do with his decision. He said how I took to him WAS unusually intense and quick, but that did not change anything since he already made the decision before I told him all that. He said the whole thing is his age. He's 70. He looks a lot younger, so maybe he thinks I think he is younger though I googled him, but the whole situation is he couldn't be there for me for the time I needed in the course of treatment.
>
> The female he referred me to is in training. He said my insurance would never pay for this type of treatment and that she would work with me anyway. it was inferred the rheumatologist md is in training too, from the things told to me. He has some published research on psychology in conjunction w/childhood illness, i guess this is his area of interest now. It takes many years to become a psychoanalysist, much more in addition to becoming a psychiatrist (which is just one reason why I think so many mental health professionals are against it-just me thinking out loud) and I think this doctor is overseeing people who are in the process of becoming analysts. I can see why some people want to keep the practice from dying out; maybe he is one of them.
>
> He said some endearing things to me and also he said he thought I'm extremely intelligent and really have made good for myself despite all the trauma and have good coping skills and basically that he is putting me on a path to reach my full potential, but it will take time and 3-5 times per week. After we spoke, I felt incredibily bonded to him-but not through the transference, but as 2 humnan beings.
>
> He never even asked for my insurance card or info after all this time, and he just called in my scripts and said he will mail the sch. II one to me. Thinking back, when I initially spoke to him, the plan was to find people who could help me-doctors, therapists, whoever would be best for what I needed. I don't know how it got in my mind I was even his patient to begin with. The whole thing was supposed to be more like my consulting him to determine the best course of treatment, to help me.
>
> It's just so strange how this mirrors my real life-becoming attached to my father, who was totally unavailable my whole life, basically abandoned and left to depend upon my mother and it went from there...He is really persuading me to see this woman, and I will call her. he said she is really great and that I should just give her a chance and that it is imperative I tell her everything I've told him; he really emphasized that. Even when I showed up at his office extremely anxious yesterday, the chairs and tables were moved, his demeanor to me totally different, the lights different, everything. And he acted sort of like he didn't care about me all of the sudden, nonchalantly; it seemed odd he only asked me a few questions he had already asked me last week-questions of major milestones in my life as if he forgot. he takes a lot of notes, so it was a little odd. Like childhood - having no security and dealing with being abandonded by father with the dynamics of the house changed when my parents marraige fell apart, the uneasy atmosphere, and all the uncomfortablness when that happend-then being forced to depend on my mother. It is so strange hos this is mirroring my real life, I guess I can accept it better thinking that way.
>
> But I am grieving for him. I never had a father figure, never had grandfathers, never in my life trusted a man like I trusted him. He is a true gem--extremely skilled, professional, dedicated, intelligent, and compassionate. It seems like a once in a lifetime opportunity to be his patient, so its not just the transference attachment that is getting me, its the rational part of the situation too in finding the right psychiatrist and therapist.

 

Re: Article on CBT for depressed teens

Posted by Phillipa on June 18, 2009, at 14:16:34

In reply to Article on CBT for depressed teens » BirdSong, posted by jane d on June 18, 2009, at 5:36:08

Haven't read all the posts yet but so far I've learned a lot myself. Phillipa

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by antigua3 on June 18, 2009, at 15:02:57

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » antigua3, posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 11:19:25

Take all you've learned and GO FOR IT!!!
(sorry about the caps; it's just my enthusiasm showing)

Just the fact that you won't be mired in feeling abandoned by him is huge. You did make progress, but more importantly, you know the direction and the next steps you should take.

best of luck,
antigua

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71

Posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 15:38:27

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » antigua3, posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 11:19:25

> This type of therapy is defintely what will allow me to realize my full potential. I jsut hope i can find someone i connect with like him; i don't think it will ever be the same as with him.

Of course not.

It is like a first love. He opened up a whole new world for you.

However, that doesn't mean that you won't find someone else who is actually better for you than him - just different.

Sorry for the triteness.

You are enormously gifted for sure. I think whomever you see will have to recognize this and be capable of culturing you to your potential. At the very least, he shall teach you how to culture yourself.


- Scott

 

Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » SLS

Posted by garnet71 on June 18, 2009, at 16:29:12

In reply to Re: New psychiatrist/analyst can't treat me » garnet71, posted by SLS on June 18, 2009, at 15:38:27

"It is like a first love. He opened up a whole new world for you"

You sure got that right.

It's just I've been bawling my eyes out, having to resist urges to call him and ask him for comfort..and for his help in dealing with this attachment. I want to talk to him so badly. But I don't want to cross any of his boundaries calling him, perhaps bothering him. I want to hug him. I've never felt urges to hug a therapist before. I want to help clean his disorganized office, do something fun like redecorate it together. And I was going to ask him if he'd teach me about the unconsciousness, object relations, and psychology in general. I want to ask him to help me write one of my papers for school. I feel so pathetic.

But now it feels like I'm reliving my childhood scenerio, abandoned by my father, now having to depend on the female therapist, my mother. My mother was never there for me, didn't protect me, neglected me, and left me to fend for myself so I turned in to an adult when I was very young and only remember feeling like I didn't need anyone. It seemed my mother wanted us all to die, that we ruined her life. He sure made me realize I do have needs, which were unmet by both parents, brought up from my unconsciousness he exposed so well. I wanted him to know everything from my unconsciousness; as scary as that seems to me, he is the only one I want to share it with. I have little to no ego around him, just uninhibitness, a childlike playfulness.

I still want a male therapist though. Idon't feel I've ever had adverse issues with female friends, am heterosexual, and think I need to work with a male to help me deal with the childhood fatherly dynamics to be capable of a mature, seasoned love with a partner someday. I remember, though, reading about theory long ago, that there's a female and male aspect to each gender.

I finally called the female therapist, left a message. But I all i want to talk to her about is him. I'm grieving so much. I've known this doctor for only 3 hours total out of my entire life, yet felt more closly bonded to him than any other male in my entire life. It's scary and wonderful at the same time.


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