Posted by jujube on October 15, 2004, at 10:04:38
In reply to The grief is it in a nutshell » jujube, posted by AdaGrace on October 15, 2004, at 9:42:48
I think you've hit the nail on the head. I know it's not right to blame others for our drinking, but I sometimes wonder, in some cases, if others were a little more tolerant of the occasional drink and a good bender once in a while, if we wouldn't go to the excess that we seem to. Of course, self-esteem is an important factor in the life of a problem drinker. And, having others demean us and shatter an already fragile ego doesn't help. I used to let others determine my self-worth, and it ended up breaking my heart and filling my life with misery and worry. Now I try to find the good in myself. I also try to acknowledge my not only my strengths, but also my weaknesses. Once I am honest with myself in terms of both the positive and negatives, it is a bit easier not to let the actions and words of others bring me down. Be strong AdaGrace. Love yourself and keep telling yourself that you are special and that you are a good person. Others can try to bring you down, but only you can let them. Don't let them! You are worth more than that.
> Actually, eventhough I blame myself for everything, deep down, I know that if he were better to me, I would be better to myself and feel better about myself.