Posted by Phillipa on November 21, 2010, at 17:24:17
In reply to Re: Public Apology To All Past And Present » Phillipa, posted by Maxime on November 21, 2010, at 13:07:39
Would you feel better to know that yes I was raped when a teen. But then there was no such thing as "Date Rape" you were just expected to accepted it and forget it. Would you feel better to know my ex broke my nose which required the hospital to fix. But the worst thing that has happened to me is the words to this day I think of daily from my long deceased Mother who blamed me for her illness, screamed and foamed at the mouth while kicking and screaming at me? Blamed me daily for all her problems. So I learned early to apologize and not stick up for myself. But the physical stuff is long forgotten. It's the verbal/emotional abuse that remains and my fears of saying one word wrong. Because of the death at age 17 of my Mother I went into nursing to try and make up for killing my Mother. Which I fully believe I did. Even today my husband tells me I didn't kill her because she said carrying me up two flights of stairs when a baby is what made her sick. But even at almost age 65 I will never ever forget that I killed her. Hence everytime a physical illness since she wished them on me also I know I deserve it.
poster:Phillipa
thread:970920
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20101029/msgs/970947.html