Posted by Racer on February 14, 2008, at 13:50:59
In reply to Re: I don't want you to die, posted by Deneb on February 14, 2008, at 12:08:50
You know what worries me sometimes on your behalf? There have been times in my life when I've felt suicidal, and felt as though no one would take me serious about it. Sometimes it got to where I felt as though I *had to* commit suicide, that I had to commit myself to doing so, because otherwise people wouldn't ever take me seriously again.
I worry that you'll feel as though you have to "show us" that you're serious by doing something to hurt yourself, and you'll hurt yourself much more than you plan to.
Deneb -- I've told you this before, and I hope you'll remember it: it matters that you hurt, that you feel bad, and I think everyone here takes that seriously EVEN IF YOU DON'T SAY YOU WANT TO DIE. It's enough that you hurt, and it's serious enough just to say that you hurt. You don't ever have to hurt yourself to be taken seriously.
By the way, I've always kinda thought you were taught that your hurts didn't matter; that no one validated your feelings, so you learned to exaggerate them in hopes they'd be taken seriously. If there's any truth to that, I think it's a real shame. ALL children deserve better than that.
Actually, that's a trigger for me, you know. I can't have children, and I hear about parents -- people who are fortunate enough to have what I most wanted in life -- who don't even really see their children, who cause this much pain to their children, and it just feels so unfair to me. I wish I could have had a daughter like you, Deneb. Someone I could have protected from that sort of abuse. And I wish you'd had someone who protected you from it.
poster:Racer
thread:812595
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080130/msgs/812705.html