Posted by cubic_me on July 29, 2004, at 8:22:04
In reply to would like advice - honesty with friends « JenStar, posted by Dr. Bob on July 28, 2004, at 21:09:01
I've had several similar, though not nearly as 'difficult' friends in the past, one even said that she might as well not be alive if I wasn't her friend, so I understand how hard it is.
One way I found to deal with it was to think hard about how much time I could afford to spend with this person. You don't want to be harsh to her, but you don't want to feel like you have to spend every spare moment with her - you've got a busy life. You could Let her know how much you have on at the momenl (exaggerate a little if you have to!) and say that really you only have time to meet up for coffee once a week, or whatever. I've found that backing away from someone slowly is the best option, and is less likely to hurt them.
Do you know any people who she is likely to get on well with? Maybe you could introduce her to them, or suggest that she might want to see a therapist for a few sessions to get over her breakup. It's not fair on you to have to carry her along and agree with her critisisms of your old friend just to keep the peace - maybe you should challenge her on this once in a while.
Good luck, cubic
she is likely
poster:cubic_me
thread:371845
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040725/msgs/371964.html