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Dear diary May 4

Posted by Ilene on May 4, 2004, at 22:49:46

In reply to Dear diary May 3, posted by Ilene on May 3, 2004, at 21:58:52

Today was better than yesterday. I think I'm better, I think I'm better, I think I'm better, in a mild sort of way. I can *do* things again. Not everything, not totally, not perfectly, but I've been doing things I couldn't have done 2 weeks ago.

I took a carload of stuff to the thrift store. I walked around and priced things for tax purposes. I called people about rentals in San Francisco. I called the moving company.

I'm trying to eat better, and trying to take my vitamins every day.

I stayed up late last night and ate unhealthy food. I woke up late, too, and almost forgot to take my meds. I finally got around to calling my friend so we could go to the thrift store together, but she wasn't home, and I decided to go anyway. I got an estimate for all my father's stuff that I donated--about $1800! I 'm not sure how that works tax-wise, but it seems worth it.

I'll go back tomorrow or Thursday and get more info. for my own tax return. I'm so anal I can't just guess. I need facts.

Being in the thrift store triggered some anxiety. My task seems overwhelming, plus I saw an extremely ugly "World's Best Grandma" statuette. It just brought up thoughts about being old. But the anxiety wasn't as bad as yesterday.

I told my husband how nice he is to me. I was thinking about it because I gassed up my van today. The little door over the gas cap used to be stuck all the time, and he fixed it for me.

I found a terrific website on self-injury, called secret shame, that included a quote that other Babblers have picked up on. I love finding information. Here's the URL, if you didn't see it on PB-psychology:
http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html

Something disgusting--I peed in my pants when I sneezed. Kegel exercises, here I come. It bothers me, but maybe not as much as it would have a couple of weeks ago. Or else I'm just avoiding the issue. Another "I'm getting old" thing.


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040430/msgs/343445.html