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Re: Reality or perception? » gardenergirl

Posted by Karen_kay on February 5, 2004, at 7:41:56

In reply to Re: Reality or perception? » Karen_kay, posted by gardenergirl on February 4, 2004, at 23:23:21

Of course I forgive you. Something strange happened last night. I set out with a friend to go to the grocery and decided out of the blue to take the long way, as "We were looking for an adventure." She didn't agree with the idea, as it was already 9 pm and we hadn't eaten yet, but I wouldn't change my mind. On the way there, I rolled down my window and began speaking with a man at a stop light, just basic chit-chat. After the light changed, she said, "You speak to people while you're in your car? You're weird!" That REALLY hurt my feelings! Why not talk to people? Isn't that why we're here? We aren't here to ignore eachother are we? Then on the way, a car was pulled over on the side of the road, so I pulled over and she was again beig a bit difficult but I stuck my imaginary fingers in my ears and proceeded to assist the car that was idling. There were 2 ladies and a baby who had been stuck for over 30 minutes with no gas and NO ONE else had stopped to help them. (CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT??? It's a VERY busy road!!!) Several police officers had stopped, but had other business to attend to. Now, it's about 25 degrees outside. I gave the girl a ride to a gas station and made sure she had enough money for gas, which she did. It was even the baby's birthday... So, after that, my friend said she wouldn't have stopped. I got to the supermarket and talk to a stranger for about 25 minutes about his dog. He seemed lonely, as he just moved here from a different state and there isn't much to do. She commented on the fact that I didn't know that guy...

I asked her for an honest evaluation about me and she said I'm too superficial and too impulsive....
Well, you know what??? If being superficial and impulsive means that you talk to a stranger in a supermarket who just moved here from a different state and was probably pretty lonely, I'll take superficial and impulsive. If it means helping someone who's stuck in the cold, I don't care.... I'm almost seeing my friend in a different light now. And that's what's bothering me. She seemed rather annoyed that I took time out of our "busy" schedule to talk to someone who was lonely, that I took time out of our "busy (and I'm being sarcastic, as our fat stomachs can wait mind you!) schedule to help someone WHO NO ONE else would (AND WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT PICTURE ANYWAY?????), and she seemed really annoyed and disturbed that I talk to people at stop lights.

It bothered me a LOT that people always describe me with the word impulsive and black and white thinking comes up so often, as well as manipulative (BIGGIES for BPD), but after yesterday I realized, I'd rather have every trait for BPD and be me and more importantly be nice than not be me and not fit the characteristics and not be...Well, just not be me!!! Most importantly not be the good person I am :) (Even if it takes me 2 hours to grocery shop! Because I do far more than grocery shop, I like to think I help humanity, even if I'm not awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, just yet anyway)


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040131/msgs/309644.html