Posted by octopusprime on November 5, 2003, at 0:13:05
In reply to Re: problems with my boyfriend » kara lynne, posted by sienna on November 4, 2003, at 19:10:57
> i almost feel that if i just dont say anything but use actions (like not coming to his house) speak for me, maybe it will motivate him to talk about what is wrong.
sienna,
i haven't chatted with you before but i thought i would share my experience. be careful with wordless actions. depending on who you are and you your boyfriend is, these kinds of actions can degrade into a passive-aggressive silent treatment downward spiral. i have been there and stole that t-shirt. not fun.
keep in mind that eventually you will have to say what you want from your boyfriend flat out, and he may not prompt you or inquire about your absence or respond in kind with his own feelings. sometimes you have to find your own space and voice. make sure you know what you want before asking for it.
good luck. this is not easy. i'm sorry to hear you are going through it.
poster:octopusprime
thread:276554
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031031/msgs/276714.html