Posted by Emme on October 18, 2003, at 9:29:42
In reply to Re: Why is it we're supposed to want to live?, posted by Dinah on October 18, 2003, at 9:13:07
Oh Dinah,
I'm so sorry you are sliding down into the abyss. It feels so isolating. You wouldn't be alone down there. I hope we can all pull each other out. Why do you sometimes think your son would be better off without you? With such a smart, kind mother, he'd surely be worse off.
I hope your husband comes to understand that what he did was not kind and didn't help your situation. Are you able to at least let him know that what he said was upsetting to you?
I hope you have a better day.
(((Dinah)))
Emme
> My kid. That's the main reason it would matter if I killed myself. Yet sometimes I wonder if I'm really doing him a favor, if he might not be better off without me.
>
> I have a few worst case scenarios in my mind, where all the shoulds won't outweigh the fear. My husband, admittedly unwittingly, threatened me with one of them last night. He talked about how we might have to leave the city and my family and more importantly his family and my therapist, in order for him to get a decent job. This was based on nothing, as far as I can tell. His job isn't in any danger, not even by rumor, and I can't help thinking that it had something to do with the fact that he was unhappy with something I did (which he was) and wanted to scare me. I didn't, of course, tell him what my response to that would be. I'd not do that. But needless to say, I feel farther in the hole today and slipping rapidly.
poster:Emme
thread:270149
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031011/msgs/270539.html