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Girls: Frank talk about sex, depression and meds

Posted by babs on May 21, 2003, at 18:29:10

WARNING: This could get explicit but I'll try to be mellow.

I have had no sex drive since starting my current meds about two years ago. My mom was diagnosed with cancer in December (she just passed away April 8) and since then my sex drive went from 0 to negative numbers. I thought it was no problem because my boyfriend never complained but I recently found out he has been "taking care of things" himself because he felt I had so much going on he didn't want to bother me with one more thing.He has been masturbating four times a week I was recently shocked to learn! So obviously it's more of an issue than I thought.

Before SSRI's I had a very healthy sex drive and sex with my boyfriend was really good but I have never orgasmed easily and SSRI's made it even worse. To top it all off one of the meds I'm on causes vaginal dryness so sex was not pleasurable and sometimes even painful. My boyfriend and I had sex about once a month and I did it partially for him and partially because it made me feel close to him.

I asked a friend who is also on SSRI's what she did to compensate and she mentioned "toys". I also did a little internet research and found out about Replens which helps with vaginal dryness. So I did a little shopping today. I bought some Replens which seems to work well and some "toys". My boyfriend wasn't home so I decided to try out my new toy without him. Whoa! Apparently I can have orgasms. But now I'm freaking out! If I can have orgasms with my new toy, why can't I have them with him? I'm very anxious about our relationship to begin with and now I'm wondering if I've been kidding myself all along blaming the SSRI's when maybe the problem is us. Any advice? thanks and I hope this wasn't too explicit.


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