Posted by Eddie Sylvano on May 15, 2003, at 10:27:16
In reply to Re: The seriousness of sanity » Eddie Sylvano, posted by Dinah on May 14, 2003, at 18:33:40
>Sometimes I can manage inspired silliness, but nonchalance is way beyond me.
---------------I wonder how much of that is social. You have to learn to be concerned about things somehow, and beyond survival, I doubt that it's an anthropological imperative to fret over one's car insurance.
> A scratch on my car is no problem, unless I don't know how it got there. Then all the OCD thoughts start up big time. Did I hit someone and didn't realize it? How can I be sure I didn't hit someone? Maybe I hit someone but chose not to remember it? And financial problems bring big worries about bringing disaster to my family.
------------------That's interesting. I've never really appreciated what OCD does to people, but reading your post about a car scratch makes it clear.
> You said "I'm pleased to find myself alive each day, and try to plan fun, interesting things to do and have.". That is an astonishingly wonderful way to look at the world to me. I'm not sure I ever had that talent.
----------------I just don't expect much, I guess. I have no grand vision of how my life should be, so I don't have a model to point to and say "I'm a failure." I used to say that as long as I wasn't dying or in prison, things were going well. Tack on poor to that list of qualifiers, and that's where I am right now. I think all I've ever really wanted beyond survival and stability is to be loved, and now I am, so nothing else matters much.
Thanks for the compliments, Dinah. They make me so embarassed :)
poster:Eddie Sylvano
thread:226042
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030506/msgs/226820.html