Posted by judy1 on August 25, 2002, at 13:19:24
In reply to maybe this should be on psycho-psycho - ?, posted by Medusa on August 25, 2002, at 12:48:26
I don't think it matters where you post this, so don't worry. I think my older sister feels a lot like you (guilt for not protecting me) but I certainly have no anger or any negative feelings towards her. She didn't hurt me, she couldn't protect me, all she can do now is try and take care of herself (like you). Guilt can eat you alive, so that is where I would start in therapy. Have you discussed this with your sister at all? Mine won't speak about it and I really feel badly for her because I want her to know I don't blame her, I blame the person who did it to me. I think you really need to understand that from the victim's point of view- and maybe if you understand that you won't hurt yourself so much over what happened in the past. Because the person who hurt me is dead, I write my feelings on pieces of paper and bury them and sometimes plant flowers above so something beautiful can grow in the present over the buried past. I guess that's what you have to keep telling yourself, the past is over, you are not to blame- the monster who did the act is to blame. I'm sorry you are in pain- judy
poster:judy1
thread:29250
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020820/msgs/29252.html