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Re: happy endingsLiLi Shar

Posted by Phil on April 25, 2002, at 6:49:13

In reply to Re: happy endings, posted by Shar on April 25, 2002, at 0:12:55

Shar, We think the same on so much and I have the thought; I'm almost 48 and I don't have kids, family, great job, money, etc. I just bought a book on Zen called 'NOTHING SPECIAL Living Zen'.
It's by Charlotte Joko Beck. I think she was the founder of the San Diego Zen Center and still teaches there. I'd have to put this down as a book recommendation for all of us.
Haven't read a lot of the book but Zen is learning to stop those wheels in our head from turning, for one thing. She also talks about how our society chases after all the wrong things.
I think depression is a main factor in a lot of suicides but I think societal(word?) pressure is the biggie. We all know, all day long, all over America we're chasing the carrot. We have to have certain 'things' to be happy or titles to be happy or we feel, if we don't have a degree, like me, we aren't smart or good enough. We all know it's bullshit.
LiLi, if I could bo so bold as to make a recommendation, read this or other books that talk about what's REALLY important in life. It's not even close to how most of us live.
We have a disease and I finally learned that I'm going to cut myself some slack. The battle I win is getting up everyday and trying to go to work.
It isn't the makings of a hero in this society; I can't brag about it to co-workers, haha. But, in the world of what's really important, we are all worthy of a touch of serenity.
My older brothers probably thought my depression was bullshit or an excuse at one time. But they have seen me knocked down so many times and, like everyone else, the struggles with meds over the past20 years. Now that more info on depression is getting out slowly and I've MADE THEM LISTEN, in a lot of ways, I think I'm the one they admire. I'm rambling, sorry. I also agree with Shar that people should wait til they are 50 to consider suicide. I also agree that at our lowest points in life, we try to change ourselves. Sometimes in the middle of a kick ass depression, I will decide to quit smoking. I make it 5 minutes then beat myself up for a few months over being stupid to try. Anyway...give it some thought.

Phil


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