Posted by sar on August 19, 2001, at 1:56:13
In reply to Why is it . . . , posted by akc on August 18, 2001, at 16:47:34
> that if you open up to a group of people (who are there for support -- in this case a twelve step group), do they feel a need to tell you what meds they are on as if their meds would solve your problems?
just to be an optimist for a moment, do you believe it might just be the excitement factor? for some ppl it is religion, for others it is meds, for some it is exercise--my big testimonies are on eating organic on not shopping at Wal-Mart. if someone asked me if prozac and klopopin are a good combination i'd say YES! i think both Willow and Dreamer are on Effexor--i tried that drug for some time and it really didn't agree with me, but if it works for them, hey--just be the wise little buddha that you are and say "different strokes for different folks..."
>
> I've been going to a new AA meeting, and have been sharing too much I think, because some folks have been being way too familiar with me. I think I know why I am disliking AA these days, but not alanon. In alanon, the first and most important lesson you learn is that you cannot fix or control other people. So when I share in alanon, I get a lot of support -- a lot of hugs, a lot of concern, a lot of kind words. AA people never seem to learn this (unless they do alanon also). But for the third straight week, some woman at this AA meeting (a different person each week), without really knowing my problem, other than I have a mental illness, told me her cocktail -- and today even said, you ought to try it. I always kindly say, I have a great pdoc who I really trust and thanks, but no thanks.you live in kansas city, right? there must be many AA meetings--could you try a different one?
> The bigger problem is that I need to keep my big mouth shut at this meeting. I was seeking support. I'm nervous about this surgery, and I spoke because of that. I had another woman state that she wouldn't let me get depressed -- in this real authoritative voice. I kindly pointed out to her that she couldn't control whether I got depressed or not, and that what I was really looking for from the group was people to hold my hand if another depression was triggered by the surgery.
personal question, bit i'll go ahead and ask (and you don't have to answer)--what kind of surgery are you having? again, let me play optimist here and quote the bible (tho i'm not religious): "forgive them, they know not what they do." TO ME it sounds like the woman who said that is caring and concerned enough about you to take it upon herself to not allow you to get depressed but does not realize that it is completely out of her control; perhaps she has not experienced full-blown clinical depression. i think her words are hmmm...pushily caring? like no, AKC, we are not going to let you fall, we REFUSE...
> I'm tired of ignorance.
>
> I'm tired.
>
> akci hope you're more awake now, bay. i've been to a few AA meetings and found them too testimonially simplistic, i.e., "and now i've accepted the lord as my personal savior!" i always wished at the meetings that they'd say, "i really feel like having a beer right now, i miss dancing drunk, i miss drinking and smoking" but in my experience AA has been more like church--what do you think?
sar
poster:sar
thread:9808
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010817/msgs/9860.html