Posted by Ant-Rock on January 16, 2001, at 14:13:04
It's been 3 weeks since my wife asked me to leave our home. My inability to overcome a chronic depression and the resulting problems have become to much for her to handle. We were best friends, and I was always there for her when she really needed me, but wasn't much of a husband in many ways do to this curse. I know her better than I know myself, but was oblivious to the extent of her pain, as she kept most of it in and swallowed her frustrations. She also didn't have a best friend, or any close friends to turn to and this also made things much more difficult for her to handle. If I sound like I'm sticking up for her, I am, in a way. The shock of this has pushed aside the usual depression and made me see how lifeless i truly have become. The negativity and hopelessness has finally caused her to lose hope.
She has completly turned ice cold to me and doesn't want to talk about the situation. I have never felt so much pain and helplessnes in my life. Walking around like half a person, after 10 years of being in love.
My life has become a record with a scratch, unable to move forward. Year after year trying to find the next med that would make me feel alive again only reinforced my hopelessnes.
Just some feelings i felt like writing down. At rock bottom, nowhere to go but up.
Anthony
poster:Ant-Rock
thread:3972
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010105/msgs/3972.html