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Re: Boundaries with Mothers » cricket

Posted by special_k on April 9, 2006, at 5:43:33

In reply to Re: Boundaries with Mothers, posted by cricket on April 7, 2006, at 15:02:28

You know how sometimes you worry about being heartless / having no feelings... Is part of that about your hating your mother?

I'm just wondering...

Cause at times... I hate mine a lot.
Only very recently (in the past couple years)
I've felt a bit more sympathetic to her.
I used to hate her real bad...

> He's actually very good at giving me those "interpersonal effectiveness" skills when it comes to work colleagues.

yep.

> For my mother though, he seems to take a different approach. He says things like, "you could write a story and show her to be the monster that she is." I think that her damage was so insidious that he just wants me to recognize it or something.

Maybe he wants to normalise your hatred of her?
Hating her... Doesn't make you heartless...

> From what you've said about your mother, it sounds like you know what I mean about insidious. :-(

Yes. We were not a good match, not a good match at all. I can see that now. We wind each other up something chronic.

> And the fact is my mother is the charmer, the beauty (I'm the outcast) and most of society would look at her and her life and say, "oh what a delightful person".

Yeah. I understand.

> Thanks for talking me through this. You doing okay?

Yeah ok.
Thanks for asking.


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poster:special_k thread:629668
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060220/msgs/630840.html