Posted by pedr on October 1, 2009, at 9:04:07
In reply to Re: Phobic of depression » pedr, posted by Kath on September 29, 2009, at 20:28:21
> I have SAD (seasonal affective disorder) so each year from late August I take 5HTP & St. John's Wort & a homeopathic remedy to ward off the depression that comes with SAD. Each year I sort of forget to begin these things by mid-August at least, so by the last week of August I quickly go down into depression.
Yes I feel that Autumnal change too, it scares the crap out of me. The shorter nights, the change in aspect of the light, the prospect of Winter just makes me feel very down. I never managed to find anything to help, my meds never helped and the lightbox I bought didn't seem to have an effect. Hopefully now I'm on Nardil it will affect me a lot less.
> I am very fortunate in that I come out if I do the above stuff, plus use a light lamp for a few weeks. I can relate to the fear, since when I feel it beginning I get frantic & wonder how I can possibly bear to feel like I've felt before.
> I usually have fear when the leaves fall off the trees & everything becomes grey & brown & I know that several months of cold, often gloomy winter are ahead of me because my worst depression was a few winters ago...the curl up in fetal position & can't get out of bed kind.
Yes, that's the sort of fear I am talking about. Sadly I fear 'going back' all the time, even when I'm doing well. The fear and obsessive checking is always there :(
> As far as feeling badly for thinking negative thoughts....I am a worrier & have problems with anxiety. Basically with thinking thoughts that create uncomfortable emotions & feelings!
> I believe in "The Law of Attraction" also, so since I believe that basically I create my own reality, I get pretty darned stressed when I find myself thinking negative stuff & worrying about things in the future that haven't happened....worrying that I'm causing crappy stuff to happen in the future! It's pretty stressful.
Law of Attraction? don't know that. Yes, blame for thinking negative things is a beauty. I do it all day. I just can't seem to appreciate that blaming myself is a negative thing to be doing! I deem it 'worthwhile' since I believe it will motivate me to stop myself from thinking negative things. Been doing it for many years and it hasn't worked - I just can't stop it.