Posted by Dinah on November 10, 2008, at 23:30:38
In reply to Re: What is the Nicest Thing Your T Ever Said to You?, posted by Dinah on November 10, 2008, at 22:18:12
Although I must confess that when he used the L word, it was the nicest thing he could ever say. Not only because I knew he hadn't said it in all the many years I'd seen him so he sure didn't say it lightly, but also because he had told me it was a word he never used in therapy because it was too loaded a word. Saying it really didn't change anything in terms of the way he'd expressed his feelings towards me. But it did say a lot about the level of trust he felt in me, not to misinterpret it or to load it with more than he could offer.
I'd said it to him forever of course, in one way or another. From tearful, angry confessions to affectionate "Because I love you of course, you idiot." And he never misunderstood what I meant by it. Never mistook it as a romantic statement or as anything but what I really meant.
I don't even know if I should admit to it. Out of context it sounds improper. In context it seems most proper, in the old fashioned sense of the word. Platonic love, caritas, acceptance, acknowledgment. Something so natural and so totally benign that he could say it, or I could say it, in front of our respective spouses or in front of his licensing board. A statement of fact without expectation, or promises, or any meaning whatsoever beyond exactly what it is.
poster:Dinah
thread:862023
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081104/msgs/862197.html