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Re: Need a Second Opinion (Big Trigger+ Long)

Posted by mair on February 8, 2008, at 7:56:56

In reply to Re: Need a Second Opinion (Big Trigger+ Long) mair, posted by MissK on February 7, 2008, at 19:52:00

I didn't want to give the impression that this was my T's husband. I wouldn't be talking about this with her at all if it was.

I have no problems with boundaries. Few Ts could construct as firm a boundary as I've constructed for myself. I struggled with the issue of whether I should even send my pdoc a condolence card - knowing how private she is. I thought there was a chance that she would hate getting notes from her patients. Ultimately, I decided that acknowledging it now might mean that it wouldn't have to be acknowledged all over again when I next see her. My sending her a card allowed me to say what I felt I needed to in a way which didn't demand a response.

Unlike my pdoc, my T falls somewhere in the middle of the spectrum when it comes to self-revealing. She'll bring up her own experiences occasionally to make a point to me. She'll answer personal questions I've asked from time to time. It's ok because I'm very careful not to ask too much or too often. However, I've felt great sympathy for her when she was forced to process with her patients how they felt about things that affected her - like her divorce and more recently her cancer. These were events that she chose not to keep private, but I thought it was pretty crummy that she felt she had to share them with people she sees in therapy.




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