Posted by Honore on June 27, 2007, at 19:15:02
In reply to Re: Need? Anyone???, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on June 27, 2007, at 18:54:59
Llurpsie, would you say that you want people to like you, but you don't need it?
The distinction between wants and needs is pretty hard to define in some instances, and easier to define in others. For me, anyway, I tend to want the things I need, and need the things I want, although the degree of need becomes less and less, and sometimes fades away into just wanting things-- when I know I don't need them.
I mean-- maybe needs and wants are also related to the possibilites-- I might need a lot more things, if they became possible-- as they started to seem necessary to my way of life, or sense of myself as stable and continuing. If I got them-- I would start to need some of them anyway-- although maybe I could live without them-- just in a diminished way.
I guess what I"m saying is that sometimes people act as if needs and wants are very separate categories, and one of them is necessary and the other isn't, and is even sort of frivolous or self-indulgent. But once you get beyond absolute physical needs, the distinction is hard to draw-- for important wants-- Which wants are important, and which are subordinate is so different for different people
I can do without people liking me- if I'm not around people. But if people don't like me-- at least the ones I need to have life me-- it's pretty devastating-- So I can't say that I don't need it, in some way-- even if it seems peripheral. And I think the line is always moving between many needs and wants, in the same way.
Sometimes, there's a difference, and other times-- well, the difference becomes very blurred.