Posted by DAisym on June 24, 2007, at 20:04:48
In reply to Perfectionism, posted by Poet on June 24, 2007, at 11:54:49
I've spent my life trying to be perfect -- even in therapy. Some people have parents who are not supportive and don't think they will amount to much. *I* on the other hand, have parents who thought I could do anything and everything. I grew up hearing that I had what it takes to be the best -- and now they wonder why I'm not "living up to my potential." I fear mistakes because then my "real" potential will be seen.
So I get it. Totally and completely.
I think Racer is on to something though. Be proud of your own effort, not just the finished product. If you do the best you can, and still get a B, then you should be very proud of that B. I think how well we can do changes each day, so somedays we do A-work and other days we do B-work, but it is still the best we can do that day. And wanting to be perfect can be paralyzing - we become afraid to do anything, just in case it isn't perfect. Believe me, it is better to do something, even if it is B-work, than nothing. Nothing is an F...
Anyway, now that I've tortured your example to death, I want to say that I hope you can find a way to be kind to yourself and appreciate all the great things you've done.
Take care,
Daisy
poster:DAisym
thread:765379
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070612/msgs/765498.html