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Re: connection with T? Daisym

Posted by Pfinstegg on October 23, 2006, at 0:07:17

In reply to Re: connection with T? Dinah, posted by Daisym on October 22, 2006, at 23:22:37

Daisy, my experience is sort of like yours. I used to miss my analyst and long for him every moment when I wasn't with him. I used to really dread leaving the office, and he was on my mind every waking moment- and many dreams were about him, too! Gradually, this has lessened; I think I'm not so regressed, among other things. More of my thoughts and interests seem to have naturally focussed elsewhere.

I do feel sad; I've lost part of such an intense relationship. But, with three and a half years of going mostly five days a week (which I still do), a lot of the worst things which were bothering me have either disappeared or lessened. It's so mysterious- the workings of one's unconscious and all its parts. It seems far more mysterious and beyond my voluntary control now that I know a little bit about it.

Without a doubt, it's sad to begin to lose such a close, intense relationship- unlike any other we've ever had. I'm not sure if that's what Dinah is talking about, though. For her, it may be, at least in part, that her energy levels are really low now.

And you may be enduring one of those disconnected times, rather than a permanent separation. That happened to me all the time; I always thought that it was permanent, but instead, it was always because I (or some part of me) was detaching in order to avoid really feeling and looking at things. Who knows, it could easily happen to me again at tomorrow's hour!

I'm sorry you've had to miss sessions: I hope you are able to get back to regular ones soon. Since I think it's generally agreed here that you have the most outstanding therapist in terms of offering support and genuine warmth and caring, and, most importantly, in being able to hear and deal with painful, angry or critical things, he's someone you can count on to talk over these feelings you've been having lately.




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