Posted by Racer on October 6, 2006, at 13:28:23
In reply to Re: Can't versus Won't versus Don't... » Racer, posted by Dinah on October 6, 2006, at 8:56:12
> I struggle with this myself. A lot. I always assume that if I once could, I can now if I just try hard enough. So clearly I must not be trying hard enough.
Yeah, that's about it. Only, some of the things I obsess over are not things I have ever been able to do. It's more of a "If it's possible to do them, I *must* be capable of doing them -- if only I Try Hard Enough..."
(Damn -- maybe the word I need to eliminate from my vocabulary is "Enough?" Seems to be a theme, huh?)
>
> But oddly, I don't think those things of others. I tend to think that they're doing their best given what's happening to them, and that given what's happening to them, they're succeeding well. I guess for others, I recognize external factors, while for myself I only recognize internal ones.Here's the part I would love some clarification on: I think of what's going on with me right now as being "internal factors" -- depression, despair, etc. (And some physical problems, which really are getting in the way of practical things, as well as adding to the mental pain.) And, because they're internal, I think of them as things I can overcome if I just try harder. (At least I avoided the S-word. And the E-word.) Can you explain whether that's part of what you consider external factors for others? Or is it part of the internal factors for you, too?
And Dinah? I know you don't judge others the way you judge yourself. I'm not suggesting by this that I think you're applying your rules to me, I'm only trying to learn to bash myself a bit less. And probably sticking my foot in it. (My mouth is a perfect size 6.5B. I know, lots of experience with it...)
poster:Racer
thread:692309
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060926/msgs/692418.html