Posted by Racer on March 3, 2006, at 14:57:19
In reply to Re: To Group, or not to Group...(trigger) » Daisym, posted by Voce on March 3, 2006, at 0:44:21
I'm with Emily Elizabeth -- go to a few group sessions and then decide. You're not making a choice that will stay with you for life. You're choosing whether or not to give this a try. Just like with a new AD, if there are adverse effects, you can stop the treatment.
Deep breath, now is it frightening to you to think that maybe you're doing something good for yourself? Is it frightening that maybe you're taking care of yourself quite actively, rather than doing the minimum required to allow you to make everyone else happy? (This is something that's coming up for me, so consider it pure projection...)
When I was a kid, my mother told me that I could never tell anyone, because it would be too embarrassing for her. That stayed with me, and even know I do feel a little disloyalty every time I say, "Yes, I was sexually abused as a child." I'm a bit farther than you are in this, only because it's been so many, many years since I first said that out loud. But even now, there's a bit of me saying "Mommy would be embarrassed that I'm telling." But you know what? Another part of me says, "you won't heal until you can *feel* that it was something *done to* you, not something you caused to happen." And, if that's true, part of what that involves is recognizing my mother's own complicity in it, through her instruction to keep it a secret. Does that make any sense?
So, my naughty little girl friend, learning that you can "tell on" him, and survive telling, may be part of your recovery process, too. Maybe you can learn to think of this as part of healing?
Got another one for you, too, on accounta my brain hurts today and it's making weird things come up: is it shameful to be A Cancer Survivor? Chew on that for a bit...
(It just came up -- that was free association. I'm gonna chew on it, too.)
poster:Racer
thread:614972
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060225/msgs/615466.html