Posted by fairywings on December 16, 2005, at 18:47:37
In reply to Re: I don't like... » fairywings, posted by alexandra_k2 on December 16, 2005, at 16:40:13
> maybe... but maybe he thinks you have been hurt and find it hard to trust sometimes.
Hi Alex,
Yes, trust is a big topic in therapy for me, and he's really been good about it, never criticizing, never judging, very patient.
> ah.
> if you told him that...
> then i think he would understand.
> maybe he didn't realise it is / was such a big issue for you.He knows what a huge issue it is for me. I just keep wondering if he was trying to get me to "say it". He knows this is probably my biggest issue, the most painful for me, the source of incredible shame and pain, because it encompases everything else. it's the only thing so far that could reduce me to tears. it hasn't, but it could. So, i don't understand why, at the last minute he pushed me on it.
> we can be all hurt and scared on the inside but from the outside we still look cool calm and collected (hard to credit but apparantly that is i wish it wasn't so, but you can read me like a book. he's agreed that i don't hide things well. he knew i was afraid. he knew that telling him the week b4 felt incredibly risky for me. i'm pretty sure he kept talking - giving me the history lesson, hoping i'd eventually relax.i appreciate your thoughts alex. i guess i'll have to ask him, and tell him how stupid that seemed to me. this last session has really left me feeling bad. i can feel every nerve, i feel sick, my chest aches, and i feel like i've let the cat out of the bag - no trying to get it back in, it's been stuffed in there too long.
fairywings
poster:fairywings
thread:589578
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051216/msgs/589647.html