Posted by fallsfall on June 26, 2005, at 11:40:50
In reply to T comment about Babble, posted by gardenergirl on June 25, 2005, at 23:39:45
My therapist said the same thing 18 months ago.
I'm not in a very chatty mood right now, so I'll just give you an outline.
He said that it felt like there were more people in the room than just him and me. And he couldn't tell which ideas were my ideas and which ideas came from the board. He particularly didn't like the "He said... I said..." kinds of posts - he says that noone except him and me knows what was going on in the therapy room. And that he doesn't want me speculating about what he was thinking or meaning, that he wants me to ask him about it - so I will know what was *really* going on. I did reduce the amount of discussion that I had (both on the board and in IMs and emails) about the details of my therapy sessions. Things are going well, so I sort of have to assume that that wasn't a bad thing.
There are still times when I do tell the story of what has happened in therapy (like last week). I then brought in my posts and read my posts (but not the responses) so that he could see the progression of my thoughts over time. And so he could see how angry I was right after the session. He was surprised by my reaction to the session. But he still wasn't thrilled that I read my posts (he said it was like the olden days)- he would rather I "told" him about it (but by then the emotion is gone...).
I do find when I have a rough session on Thursday, and I'll be seeing him on Friday that I do tend to keep it to myself. But Friday to Monday and Monday to Thursday can be rough. And I think that if I didn't Babble, that I would ruminate a lot more. I think he would be happier if I journalled, and then didn't share my journalling.
So we go back and forth on this. I want to share the stuff so I can understand better and see what other perspectives might be. He wants me to not share it so that he can work with me without outside influences.
I think I share less now also because I trust him more. I trust him to have my best interests in mind. I trust him to work things through with me. I trust him to be skilled. So I don't feel like I have to normalize our therapy sessions - I don't have to be comforted by others who have survived the same thing. Because I know that he will make it so I can survive. I don't feel like I need you guys to *protect* me from him.
He has the same problem when I share with IRL friends, by the way. He doesn't mind when I talk about issues with my daughter or my life. I think he only minds when I talk about the process of therapy itself. When I talk about my relationship to him, and the issues we are working through.
Guess I was chattier than I thought.