Posted by pinkeye on May 20, 2005, at 15:01:24
In reply to Relationship with T/Bad Session (very long), posted by 10derHeart on May 19, 2005, at 17:50:19
Nowadays I am coming to realize more and more, that even though external circumstances are responsible 50 %, the way I react to it is what is important for me.
For instance, I have had several communication gaps with both my ex T and my current T. But the way I reacted to my ex T was 100 times more intense than the way I react to my current T. I have had bad sessions (email sessionS) with my ex T and I have had bad sessions (face to face) with my current T. But I would react so much more vigorously to something slightly wrong that my ex T had said, and I might let go off a huge mistake on my current T. Just because I am so intense with my exT and not at all intense with my current T.
The point is, even though the other party is responsibly for what they do, the way we react to it - that part - we can control.
So if you react too badly to something which you know in your heart you shouldn't be, a good thing to do would be to explore that and see where your reaction is coming from, rather than focussing on if your T missed out something. Every T misses out something many times.
poster:pinkeye
thread:500036
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050513/msgs/500412.html