Posted by antigua on April 6, 2005, at 11:30:24
In reply to Focus of therapy sessions (slight trigger), posted by daisym on April 6, 2005, at 0:37:37
It all sounds perfectly normal to me. I have been feeling so low lately that I was afraid to tell my T today how badly I really felt. She got the message but I managed to switch subjects around enough that she didn't get too far. Like you, I can say now that last week I should have confessed and maybe considered the hospital, but I can't do that to my family. I remember visiting my mother in the "mental" hospital, as they often were called way back when, and while my feelings are out of proportion to my situation, it still really triggers me.
It's the calm moments of what I consider absolute lucidity that scare me most, when maybe my children and their future aren't enough. Sorry to be so blue.
The things you wrote about sex are good for you, I think you know. It is wonderful when the abuse can be separated out and sex is just sex, but in a good way if you know what I mean. I think that's progress, Daisy, because I've been working on that too.
It was suggested to me that maybe I can't express/let go, whatever, my rage at my father (I simply don't feel it; it's so buried) because then I might never feel the same way about him again, and I may never feel that intense love again. It's a concept I'm definitely willing to consider.
This wall is getting heavier and heavier...
antigua
poster:antigua
thread:480557
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050329/msgs/480674.html