Posted by Pfinstegg on January 2, 2005, at 15:17:25
In reply to Re: Coexisting Ego States » Pfinstegg, posted by antigua on December 31, 2004, at 8:00:43
I don't think you are alone in having difficulty trusting or feeling securely attached. I have, at times, been agonized about the same thing- feeling that I could never trust, or feel close to, my analyst, even though I felt an overpowering need to do so. He said, " for people who have been severely abused, it's a goal of therapy- not a requirement." I am feeling a lot better in terms of trust and attachment now (with many moments of backsliding). I do feel that the interaction I have with him is the bedrock which is allowing good things to happen in my therapy. As you know, I do go a LOT- every day. I think this is what allows the trust and attachment to take place- having these daily positive experiences with him. It's really my unconscious and his unconscious interacting, (modified some by his judicious decisions about what to actually give voice to). It certainly isn't within my power to decide to trust, and then just do it. But I do believe that we all have impulses within our brains towards recovery, health, trust and attachment, if we can just find a way to activate them. It's our God-given, or evolution-evolved, gift as mammals. It isn't forever beyond your reach, antigua- please don't come to that conclusion permanently. I do hope I'll read here, in the next year, that you have found your way, also.
poster:Pfinstegg
thread:433059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041228/msgs/436833.html