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Re: Dinah

Posted by alexandra_k on December 17, 2004, at 14:27:26

In reply to Re: Dinah » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on December 17, 2004, at 6:03:06

Yeah. I know that I thought about this really hard and decided that the relationship was worth more to me than the problems were probamatic. But the trouble is that trust is becoming a real issue now.

I am genuinely doing my best to move on from the past hurts and open up to him.

But I don't seem to be able anymore. I just feel numb. Kind of half asleep in a safe place if that makes any sense. He noticed and asked about whether I had problems trusting people. I said that I trust different people in different ways. I guess I was pretty defensive really.

But there are consequences for ones actions (as they try to make clear to you when you do DBT). Of course that is aimed at making other peoples negative responses to you understandable. But it isn't just about that. There are consequences of his not being able to keep his word etc. And the consequence is that I don't trust him. My face doesn't light up when he promices something nice because I don't believe him anymore.

If it was a real world relationship things would be different. But he is supposed to be my therapist for gods sake.

I shall tell him this. I don't think he is in a position to give me psychotherapy. It really was great of him to take me on when noone else would, but he doesn't seem able to do this properly. I guess rapport is mostly about what you say in a single session. Trust takes time and is more about what you do.

This isn't good for me.

 

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poster:alexandra_k thread:427911
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041210/msgs/430884.html