Posted by messadivoce on November 24, 2004, at 2:34:05
In reply to I think I'm losing it a little, posted by daisym on November 23, 2004, at 23:48:14
Oh my dear, that thread could have been written by me 6 months ago!
My former T was very good at articulating my broken thoughts for me, and once I expressed to him how I wished he could hold me in his arms. He looked at me with such compassion and kindness with those warm brown eyes (which I miss!) and said, "I wish I could do that for you, but I can't. But I can hold you in other ways." Which he did: with words, with gentleness and unwavering acceptance.
It's horrible, tormenting and painful to feel so strongly about someone! To hope and wish that they could meet all your needs! Your T is just a man after all, and that is something I need to remind myself of when it comes to my T as well.
I know that my T was very wonderful at helping me work through those feelings of utter dependency. Yours sounds like he is good at this too. Keep ploughing through it! My months in therapy were hell, but they are finally paying off now. That's my honest viewpoint from the other "end."