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Calming thoughts

Posted by tabitha on May 27, 2004, at 11:19:08

Folks, I've been trying to combat my negative and self-critical thoughts. Mostly just swatting them away like gnats. Last night a whole train of upsetting thoughts had got ahold of me. I had some recent contact with the last guy I broke up with, and I was obsessing along the usual anger/guilt lines. I did some journalling where I wrote down all the upsetting thoughts, and the possible underlying distortings, and then I wrote some alternative, calming thoughts about the situation. I came up with 7 or 8 good ones, including 'I don't need anyone's permission or approval to break up with X.' and 'X is fine without me. He is on his path, and his path does not include dating me again.' and 'I am fine without X. My path does not include getting closer to X now.'

Then I wrote some affirmations like 'Even though I sometimes have negative and self-critical thoughts, I deeply and completely accept myself'. And the amazing thing is... it worked! I felt peaceful and calm, and got a sense of relief and well-being. Immediately some more negative thoughts jumped in, so I wrote more affirmations about accepting the peaceful feelings and feeling good about my new skill with self-calming.

Then I slept pretty well, and woke up earlier than normal today. I'm going to get to work on time, which has been becoming a struggle for me lately.

I have my therapy tonight, and I'm going to take in my journal and read some of it to her. I think her jaw will drop to the floor.




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