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Re: here's how a friend of mine put it » pegasus

Posted by crushedout on April 11, 2004, at 0:16:02

In reply to Re: here's how a friend of mine put it, posted by pegasus on April 10, 2004, at 20:28:11


If my T is aware she's doing this, then it's really messed up, so I hope she's not. Yeah, I guess I'm going to address these feelings in my "extra" session, and yes, it will be on topic. But I just feel really scared because it feels like I'm accusing her of something and she's going to get defensive and find a way of twisting it around back to me. Because she's good at that. And I'm not sure anymore if it's because it really *is* about me, or because she's manipulative. Like I said, I don't know who to trust (me or her, or neither), which is hard.

Yes, she usually lets me decide completely what we talk about. That's why this seems really weird to me and I don't know what to make of it. It feels almost like she's giving me an ultimatum, which doesn't seem appropriate. And why is she doing that?

> Yeah, your friend's synopsis sounds right on from what you've said here. I wonder if your T is aware that she is doing this? Are you going to bring up those feelings in your "extra" session? It seems like it is tied in with the issues that you have with her, so you'd be on her prescribed topic anyway.
>
> I agree that it's odd for a T to say something that sounds like you have to use a particular session for a particular topic. It sounds as if she might be frustrated that you haven't been getting into this topic recently, and she's eager to discuss it? Although, she could just say that, in a more open ended way, and let you pick the right time. Does she often direct what you'll talk about in your sessions? Or is it normally up to you? If it's the latter, then I can totally see how this is confusing, and feels manipulative. Although some Ts normally use a more directive approach, so then it wouldn't be out of line for her to say what she'd like for you to talk about. I think.
>
> pegasus


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