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Re: crash after a great week fallsfall

Posted by crushedout on March 19, 2004, at 15:27:39

In reply to Re: crash after a great week crushedout, posted by fallsfall on March 19, 2004, at 15:02:27


Sometimes I wonder if my therapist is just more in touch with or honest about her countertransference than other therapists are, and if that's the case, I respect that a lot, I think. I value honesty and openness a great deal (who doesn't?).

Anyway, perhaps I need to learn to say to myself, "Even if she *is* mad at me, it doesn't mean she doesn't care about me, and it certainly isn't the end of the world." That's also true and an important lesson to learn. It's just that I feel so dependent on her that I'm *extremely* vulnerable, and afraid of losing even a part of her because of her anger.


> >But I do have this problem of what do I do when my session makes me feel like crud and I'm all paranoid but I don't feel like I can call her because she'll be mad at me. I guess I need to talk to her about this soon. Because it would be nice not to have to carry that depression and paranoia around with me for days.
>
> It seems like your therapist does admit to countertransference reasonably frequently. I think that it is good when they can admit to it, but I'm a little concerned that she is running into her issues so frequently. Maybe your particular issues happen to bump into her particular issues a lot - maybe other clients don't "push her buttons" as much as you do.
>
> I have been able to work on the issue of surviving until my next session when I think my therapist is mad. For me, it took many times of being miserable until my next session, and then having him reassure me that my fears were unfounded. Over time, I was able to tell myself "Your fears are probably unfounded, so don't freak out until you can check this out". That way I was spending the time between sessions NOT freaked out, instead of freaked out. But if she *is* getting mad, then this might not work for you.
>
> Life is so confusing.


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