Posted by Bob on May 30, 2003, at 2:36:48
In reply to Re: Refractory Bitterness, Anger, and Resentment, posted by deirdrehbrt on May 29, 2003, at 15:10:57
> Bob,
> I can understand how you feel; I often feel similarly. I look at my peers and they are better educated, married or in committed relationships, own their own houses, etc. Not all of them have the complete package, but most have the majority of it. I am so disappointed that I don't have this, and don't have the capacity right now to get there.
> I have two kids. I would very much like to be able to do things with them. I can't drive, I don't have the money to send them to camps in the summer. I'm terrified of how I will ever afford college.
> I do manage to get a little satisfaction, when I'm not in a real self-critical mood, of what I was doing for work. I have also found that crafts may lead to some possible income.
> Other than that, as my therapist reminds me, I have to congratulate myself for the successes that I experience day-to-day. I guess our friends have success in their careers and such, but they don't have to do so with what we are experiencing. If they had to constantly worry about staying alive, being able to eat, self injury, medications that make you shake more than a freight train over old tracks, and everything else that goes with it, they wouldn't come near to what they are doing.
> As for you, I can tell that you have a fairly good education. You have a good vocabulary, you express your points well, you know how to use a computer. You have tallents. You have a lot going for you, even if it's hidden behind the illness right now. Keep taking it out, keep using the parts that you can. It's in there, and when you can, make it grow. If some doesn't grow, you can let it rest without having to beat yourself up over it.
> I hope I don't sound too preachy,
> Dee.Dee:
I didn't take any of your advice as preaching. The beginning of your post hit home with me very well. It seems you know exactly how I feel. With this, and other major diseases, we have the unique opportunity to watch the world pull away from us. I feel for you, as I do for all of us in this situation. I will try to take some of the things you said to heart. Thanks for a well written post.
Bob
poster:Bob
thread:229646
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030529/msgs/230148.html