Posted by europerep on January 8, 2011, at 6:44:17
In reply to Re: I think Parnate is making me actually worse.. » europerep, posted by Maxime on January 7, 2011, at 19:22:57
> >
> > sorry for the ramble, had to say that.. I'll see that doc one and a half weeks from now, obviously I'll still have to get rid of tranylcypromine, which will take a little longer, but then I'll know whether she'll eventually prescribe it to me or not...
>
> I pray that she prescribes it for you. Or Nardil.
>
> Please don't think of suicide right now. You haven't explored all your options. I would be so sad if one day you disappeared and stopped posting.
>
> Hugs,
> MaximeThanks, that's very nice of you!
As for your first question, my "Parnate" is actually coming from Germany, and I received it within days of ordering, so I'm quite sure they didn't backorder it from somewhere else like India. I can understand your concerns about Indian products, although they do make a lot of quality stuff over there too (I think 50% of the medication the UN dispenses comes from India).. I too was surprised though when Christ_Emp mentioned that his doc was allright with him importing abilify from there.. that's still a patented product after all!
I have also thought about Nardil of course.. I'm thinking, if I don't have anxiety, and an MAOI actually makes me feel worse, there's no real point in trying it.. but I will keep it in mind of course.
You know, I just wonder what would be the point if I kept on living like this for another set of years, and then I come out of depression at 30 or whatever.. there's no way I am currently able to finish my studies (or work), so I would have to start all over by then. there's no way I would not be totally, 100% alone by that point, and seeing my personal history with regards to these issues, I surely won't then be able find anyone. In short, my life would simply suck. I *am* giving myself some more time, so don't worry, but like you I have set aside some meds I would need "au cas oł" (I can't let them go unused after all haha - sorry that was a bad joke)... I don't want to spend life as a stupid idiot who hasn't been able to reach a single one of all the goals he has had in life, most of them being ones that others can have *so* easily... And the point is not that I cannot stand myself - well, not like this, but I used to like myself, as did others, it's just that now I am not able to have even the slightest meaningful social interaction, and this is soo frustrating. If this is how my life is meant to be, then I just don't want it. But, as I said, don't worry, I have given myself some time (and a list of meds or things I want to try), and if none of them does anything for me, I'll see what I'll do by then..
Hugs back, if I may :)...
poster:europerep
thread:975831
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20101231/msgs/976169.html