Posted by Vincent_QC on December 14, 2008, at 6:33:24
In reply to Re: Nardil + Insomnia - Re to 'ParnateStarted2008' » Vincent_QC, posted by ParnateStarted2008 on December 13, 2008, at 14:35:06
> Hi Vince, I too write long posts or I cant get out what I want to say..
> My new tactic is using some small lines when needed eg.
> - paeudoiuhefiue
> -ca va vince
> - iejuwoduiejd
> Helps some what
Heu??? I'm confuse now! hahaha I'm suppose tu understand something? ;-)
> I like reading long posts. I am here to get as much help and information as I can. You have ALOT of knowledge and a story that, to me, is important, full of information, Similar to my problem(somewhat) and I feel so much better to hear Im not the only one feeling these horrible thoughts that come with Social Phobia. Our "bad thoughts" are different but probably not less severe. I take you seriously because you are sincerely a companion struggling with Social Phobia(and all the other metal hell that goes along with it).>>
Yeah, that's important to feel support by the others and to see that we are not alone in the world to feel this way. Your story is also important for me, I can see that the "human" have a complex nature. We have all differents experiences and problems, it's why I always say that for each "specific" mental problem, everyone have a different feeling or live it differently... Ho well...sorry for my bad english...I do my best! lol
I mean, each week at my weekly appointments at the psychiatric hopital, I see peoples in such bad mental health conditions that I always thanks "god" (well I don't believe in GOD...lol), that's an expression...lol Anyway's, I say to myself ( I don't speak alone also...lol) that I have just little problems and that everythings will be ok soon. That's a kind of "encouragement".
I don't know why, but with social phobia and general anxiety, I tend to be self-centered and I forget that the world around me is not as beautifull that I think. I have too much optimistic ideals or utopia about what my life or the world is suppose to be...or I have a misconception about the world in general. I mean that my problems are nothing, at least, I have a "roof" above my head each night, I have food, I have the "Internet", so i'm a part of the "minority" of people who have everything they need, but succed to complaints at the same times...Showing a too self-centered character trait that I don't like at all on me...
> Im in a small dysphoric mania right now. Im Bipolar2 like I said but I still get break through symptoms even tho im treated, just not as bad. ive been in my room/tv room/ kitchen for 3 days now(no where else). I'm easily angered, I'm mean, I want to hurt peoples feelings, I cant be around another person or I will get soo anxious Ill have to Get very mad/mean/bully them to get them away from me(a habit when I get like this), it works, they leave but I feel bad for doing it. BUT I am sure this will be gone in a few days.
> I must take a very big nap now because I just want to be asleep when I feel this way..
Hummm, sound like it's not very easy to handle, and like you said, at least, you don't feel like this for a long time. When I read what you write, I can recognize a lot of myself in it...Like I write yesterday, I like to be different from the others, I like to be a "bitch" and "shock people", so I don't help myself by doing this and I can't blame them to not like me at all. Sure, I don't help myself by acting like this, but i TRY to change it...I think it's an anger feeling or repressed feelings from the past and the only way I found to relieve me is to act like this, and that's not good at all...
> Thank god Im A SUPER DUPER rapid cycling bipolar. I could be back to normal any second.. I just need some opiots/pheno's/Barbitui/and a butt load of any benzo so I can sleep through the whole thing for a few days and come out better...>>
opiots/pheno's/Barbitui/and a butt load of any benzo ...
Sound like an explosive "combo-mix" !!! Opiots/pheno's...??? Give me this and I will do 6 hours of panic attacks, but not sleep at all...lol I smooke so much "weeds" as a teenager, I needed it for many years to be able to sleep...well it was good anytimes (morning, diner, lunch time...), when I was able to smooke it without doing panic attacks on it! lol Too bad I can't toutch any drugs or alcohol now... If I feel that I lost the control, I will lost my sanity at the same time! lol
You will probably sleep for a couple of days on this super combo-mix!!! IF you want, I can send to you the full unused bottle of "Seroquel-XR" I buy 2 weeks ago...With that, you will sleep like a baby and feel like a zombie for the week after!!! hahahaha ;-)
> ill talk to you soon.
> Ill get right back to the convo as soon as im done this nap..
> k later
Ok, well I hope you had a good nap, evening...or whatever else...
Last night, I had a not very pleasant night...I do some "exposure"... One of my friend ask me to go out at the bar with him...I was already not in a good mood, with a bad migraine and a upset stomach...and it was full of people...we stay there 3 hours and it takes all the little energy I had...so I sleep 5 hours last night, normally I sleep 2-3 hours max...lol
I think he want to go out also tonight... sound not very funny foe me but well, I will do some "exposure" again...at least I'm not alone...except when he decide to take a ride in the bar and leave me alone for a couple of minutes... but that's another story...lol
Well, we talk more later good boy! Take care of you ok ;-)